15 months between 2 children - how shall I cope & should Older one go to nusery?

[Moop]

Hello

I am due to have a second baby in mid May and it means that there will be 15 months between my two. I am trying to get advice/experience from people who have been through this - how tough is it?

We live in Belgium so have no family nearby and though I know some people they have their own children and I would not be able to leave my eldest with them.I have looked at a nursery from Sept for older one when she would be 18 months but the one I went to today I was a little disappointed and felt some of the 1-2 yr olds looked a bit lost and I didn't get a good vibe.

I know my time will be limited and I don't want the older one to suffer. There is a very good local group where I will be able to take both children (if I can get organised enough to do so).

What advice to people have?

thanks

Moop

My two are two years apart, and I certainly found it good to have the older one in nursery for two morning initially as it meant I could give DD2 a bit of undivided attention. However, she was already used to a nursery setting and was extremely sociable. I would personally be very wary of doing anything in the early days which makes your eldest feel pushed out however well meaning (and three - four months after the baby's birth is still definately early days as far as sibling relationships are concerned). I would go with your gut on the nursery - if you weren't happy they I'd look elsewhere, but only do it if you think the older would really enjoy it.

Hi Moop,

Congrulations!

There is 15 months between my DS1 and DD1 too.

I won't say it was easy but it was worth it as they are now 7 and 8 and best of friends.

I was lucky as my son was not a jealous child and enjoyed helping out with his sister. He did go to nursery from about 18 months old but I felt he needed it.

It was a struggle. No family near by and dad not very hands on.

You need to be quite organized but most of all enjoy them. They grow up too quickly.

My two are 18 months apart, so a slightly larger age gap. However, as ds didn't walk until 17 months, perhaps not much different!
I didn't put him into nursery or anything, and didn't have any family nearby to help. But I did go to loads of toddler groups etc - my aim of the day was to get out in the morning and go to whatever was on that day. After that the rest of the day just kind of fell into place.

mine 20 months apart, never used nursery as no money! 2 in nappies etc is quite a challenge but wonderful once they hit about 3 y.o.

Can second what Girders said about 1 outing per day. May is great time, as the park just beckons in nice weather!

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