Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Crisis over childcare arrangements, any advice?

13 replies

angel1976 · 09/01/2009 14:18

Hi all,

I'm having a real crisis at the moment with regards to the childcare arrangements I have made for DS (10.5 months now, will be 11.5 months when he goes into childcare). Can anyone help? Bit of background: Saw lots of nurseries before going for this particular one (attached to a primary school and also part of a SureStart children's centre) as I really liked the feel of the place. The staff were lovely too. However at the time of looking they could only offer me 2 days a week (I need 4) so we took those two days and started looking for alternate childcare. We were recommended this CM who is lovely and coincidentally, she had two days free, which worked out well for us. Anyway, at that time, we thought we were getting the best of both worlds - a lovely group setting in the nursery and one-to-one care with a CM. DS would have been with CM Monday-Tuesday and nursery Thursday-Friday. Nursery called us a few weeks back to say there's two more days available now - Monday-Tuesday - did we want it? We said no initially cos we thought DS would get the both of both worlds and I wasn't sure about sticking him in nursery 4 days a week.

DH and I went to the nursery today with DS to discuss settling in procedures. DH saw the nursery for the first time and loved it (He's been to the CM before and liked it there too, I know you can't really compare anyway!). So much so that even before we had left the place, we were discussing with them the possibility of having DS there full-time in April (their next intake). DS is an independent little soul but bless him, he is starting to realise that sometimes Mummy and Daddy leave him and don't come back for a while and he does get a little upset but overall, he's okay. But I have to say I am starting to feel a little emotional about him having to adjust to two different environments and sets of people in such a short time. So now I am thinking that we should just put him in the nursery full-time as TBH, I think it would make the adjustment a lot easier and truth be told, it does make the travel logistics a lot easier to deal with (CM lives slightly further and on a very busy road so travelling in peak hour can be an issue while the nursery is just a 3 minutes drive for us on the way to the train station!).

We have already paid a deposit of £480 to the CM, which we would lose if we decide not to take up the place. I said to DH that is it worth it to make DS adjust to two different environments / people and to change that in a few months' time just so we don't lose that deposit? BTW, the CM charges more than the nursery (a £22 difference a day, which means that the 'loss' would be absorbed in the 10 weeks DS is in nursery rather than at CM iykwim), which I have to admit is a consideration as she is quite a lot more expensive than the nursery. While I don't expect to get the deposit back, is it likely the CM might give us some back? I think probably not... But the way I see it, she already had that two days free (she has a mindee the other three days) and not many people want only 2 days of CC. It's not money we can easily write off but we are prepared to if the new arrangement is better for DS. Also, the nursery is willing to keep those extra days for us as long as we give them an answer by Wednesday.

Or am I over-worrying and that DS will adjust to being at two different places easily? I have to say DS isn't the most adaptable of babies in terms of sleep... He loves his cot and whenever we are away and he is in a travel cot, he just doesn't sleep that well... My gut feel is that he will adjust to one place easier than two and he will be happy at this nursery... And if we were offered the 4 days in the beginning, we would have taken it. I think I am going mad. Any advice???????? HELP! Thanks!

Ax

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Flyonthewindscreen · 09/01/2009 14:40

I would take the nursery place for the 4 days, better for your DS to have to get used to only one environment and as you say you won't lose out financially as deposit replaced by lower nursery fees, imo

Pheebe · 09/01/2009 15:49

I agree, take the 4 days at nursery. Talk it through with the CM, you might find she is happy to give part of your deposit back at least especialy as you're giving her a months notice (check your contract with her). You could also post in the CM threads and get an opinion on usual practice from some mn CMs.

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 09/01/2009 15:53

I think 4 days in the same place wuld be easier for your ds.

Check your contract with regards to the cm

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Sidge · 09/01/2009 15:56

I would rather stick with one childcare provider where possible; easier for you and your son. I think they benefit from the continuity of one place.

You'll also save shedloads of money - £22 difference a day is quite significant over time!

MadameCastafiore · 09/01/2009 16:00

|I would stick with the one provider rather than 2 - he will be far more settled, make lovely friends and grow to love the staff.

angel1976 · 09/01/2009 16:22

Thank you all. My instinct is to go with one provider too and to go with the nursery... I have posted on the CM board to gauge what the response would be with regards to asking for part of the deposit back. I do feel so bad about the whole situation. It's just that I saw a little boy being settled today and I just know how much more difficult and confusing it would be for DS to do that at two different places...

OP posts:
mollythetortoise · 09/01/2009 16:29

definately stick to one option childcare option only.. why make life more complicated for yourself and him. Think about CM holidays/ nursery closures and sickness etc.. much better just delaing with one childcare provider rather than two. I have seen your other thread re. deposit and think you just have to swallow that.

angel1976 · 09/01/2009 16:31

Ouch! £480 down the drain...

OP posts:
shortcircuit · 09/01/2009 17:26

I think you'd be better off at the childminders - a better home environment for a little one.

My friend put her ds in a nursery & he hated. He is now with a childminder & adores her.

See if the childminder can offer more days.

angel1976 · 09/01/2009 18:21

The CM can't offer more days... She already has a mindee the other 3 days and has 3 children of her own so she only wants to have one mindee a day. TBH, we couldn't afford her for 4 days (her rate is £60/day!)! I will have a chat with her tonight regardless anyway... Thanks for all your advice.

OP posts:
Northernlurker · 09/01/2009 20:22

£60 per day sounds horribly expensive to me. My dd3 has gone to nursery since she was 12 mths and she is very happy there. Adores all the staff - pleasingly they have had no staff turnover at all in the last 9 months.

angel1976 · 09/01/2009 20:43

Hi,

Just to update that my DH and I have decided to put DS in nursery for 4 days a week. At the end of the day, we want him settled and happy and I cannot see that it's going to be easy for him to adjust to two different sets of people and environments. I've spoke to the CM and she was really understanding. She's going to finish minding her other mindee in June as her mindee's mum is finishing her year-long course and she has said that if nursery doesn't work out for my DS, she is happy for the deposit we have paid to go towards her CM-ing fees then (if we decide to use her then) so I think it's all worked out for the best. Thanks for all your advice.

Ax

OP posts:
dmo · 09/01/2009 21:18

£60 per day
i charge £3.20 per hr and feel guilty to the parents!!!!!!!!!!!!1

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread