teach me about gradual toilet training/timing?

[cyphercat]

my 17 months old DD really hates nappies and would go sit on a potty when I explain to her "but then you would have to go sit on the potty to do pee pee and poo poo?" She knows what both are (and watches me and DH and wants to do same) and will go sit on potty for about 5min. with some books. I have no idea as I wasn't ready to potty train her but she seems determined to go nappyless. I just ordered lipski toilet seat and have little potty for her to sit on.

WHAT DO I DO??? HELP I have no idea how to start. She came to me little earlier (won't wear nappy so was naked) and whinged and said "pa Pa" but I understood that as she wanted bread... - but she meant potty as when I sat her down on highchair with some bread she let go of big stream of pee pee. Second time she whinged (it was about 4 min. later), I didn't know what was the matter so I just gave her cuddle and she weeed on me!!! (how much wee can she have in her little body??) erm..so I'm completely cluless. I'm willing to help her be potty trained if she wants, but don't know where to start and how to help her. What do you do when you go out to playgroups..out..etc..and we are also going on a long trip to far east next month and will travel back again in January.

This is sort of the stage we're at w 19m DS. I've started asking him in the morning if he wants pants or nappy, and it's almost always pants. We've had a potty sitting around for a while, so he's very used to it, and started using it of his own accord a while ago when nappy-free. What I've been doing is trying to build up a sound association - psss for peeing, so we say psss when we pee (he was v fascinated for a while), and ask him if he wants a psss. He's pretty good now at saying when he wants one, and taking himself off towards his potty. However sometimes he'll say psss when he doesn't want one, or will say it and then say NO to potty and then pee in his pants a moment later. Which I'm not too bothered about, at the moment - I'd rather wash some wet trousers once a day than all the nappies!
You could read some of the stuff on EC (elimination communication - google it), though it's mostly about much much littler children. All about learning to follow their cues.

urgghh..she will sit for a bit and then go wee somewhere else. I'm not really up to this naked bottom thing and I rather she wears her nappy but I guess she could have nappy free time at home and gradually build it up. I'm just not a patient person to start with.

with ds I started using pull ups (pampers easy up pants) as they are easy to get up an down if he needs a pee. I didnt put him straight to pants as I knew he was young and we didnt need to be in a rush. We got him gradually used to sitting on the big toilet (didnt use a training seat for dd or him) as he looked too big and bulky for the potty. He will pee in the potty but has to be standing up and you hold the potty up at his willy. Over the last few weeks the vast majority of his poos (or plop plops as he calls them!!) have gone in the toilet and he was getting most of his pees in the potty or toilet too - you havwe to strip him from the waist down for sitting down though or the pee goes everywhere. If he stands though he is not tall enough for his willy to go over the rim of the toilet unless he is at home and can stand on a step stool (I still have to aim it though as otherwise he would pee on himself). He is now 2.1years and for the last few days we have been venturing out with pants on and he is doing well (before that he wore the pull ups but did tell me when he needed to pee/poo). He mainly has a wee dribble before he says he needs a pee but is able to stop the flow in time to get to the toilet to do the rest.

I suppose what I did was gradual toilet training. You need to really build up time, otherwise its going to be a bit overwhelming.

We started off by letting DS be nappy free for about an hour a day. When we went to the loo, he came too and sat on the potty. If we started to see a bit of wee, we'd whip the potty under him and he'd usually finish. Slowly he started to go to the potty to wee on his own, and once we got to 4 hours nappy off with no problems, we added the complexity of pants.

At the same time he was offered a sit on the toilet or potty at each nappy change and got dryer and dryer. He was in pants full time 2 weeks after his second birthday.

You might want to teach her a sign for toilet so that she can tell you - use it when you are on the loo

i guess you just follow her lead and be low key. it is quite feasible that she could be reliably staying dry and telling you when she needs within a short time. People will argue with you that she is not 'fully potty trained' as she is unlikely to be able to do everything herself - but that is the point- you can do it gradually. I would say being able to say when you want to go and holding on long enough till you get her there and help with clothes as needed is good enough, the rest comes later! my dd is 16 months and she says 'shwshwsh' when she needs the potty. i too have the problem that she says slightly more often thatn she actually needs to but hey, it's a small inconvenience. Get her some pants- it's hard finding them small enough. i just got age 2-3 and hoped the drier would shrink them as it always has with her big brothers whenever i have had to resort to it! also the bright bots trainer pants are good for a bit more security. take plenty of changes of clothes or put a nappy on for car journeys. If she makes the sound for weeing when it is impossible to do it, i just acknowledge and say i'm sorry, there is no potty in the car, you can do it in your nappy- actually she often just holds on but you are letting her know it is ok. try to get her used to using a big toilet at least ocasisnally or you will have to take a potty everywhere- not great! you will also find that most baby changing rooms do not actually have a toilet so it makes it really hard if they are part trained but you need to put a new nappy on eg for car journeys etc but they actually want to do a wee in a toilet.