HELP! 4 week old baby sleep on FRONT? Controversial but..........

[07mumstheword]

My 4 wk old baby does not settle, screams and screams unless my DH or I allow her to be on us front ways (chest to chest).
She won't settle on her back in her bed/cot and we are at our wits end. I've just, as an experiment put her on her tummy in her cot and she immediately settled to sleep.
Does anyone know exactly why the health professionals say babies must sleep on their backs? I know it is to prevent cot death but why because of their mouths getting blocked by the mattress?

OBVIOUSLY WE DON'T WANT TO PUT OUR BABY AT ANY RISK I'D BE SO GRATEFUL OF ANY ADVICE SO WE CAN POSSIBLY GET A NIGHTS SLEEP?

have you tried swaddling her? it may give her enough comfort to be happy on her back?

or wrap her and put her on her side with something each side to stop her rolling over. it isn't as safe as back, but it's safer than tummy.

My ds was exactly the same at 4 weeks. Within a couple more weeks though he'd got used to sleeping on his back.

I don't think anyone really knows why back-to-sleep works, just that it has cut the incidence of cot death quite dramatically. I wouldn't have been able to put ds in his cot on his front for my own piece of mind tbh.

However, dh & I did sleep propped up on pillows with ds asleep on one of our chests in the early weeks and somehow that felt safer. Have a google for how to co-sleep safely.

peace of mind . I have to say I only had a very tiny piece of mind left coping with sleep deprivation and a newborn.

I personally couldn't relax with a baby sleeping on her front. I second the suggestion to try her sleeping on her side. Not necessarily completely on her side but lying slightly angled to the side iyswim so that she can't fall onto her front. Even if you can get her to sleep like that you could move her again when she is fully asleep. My ds is now 8 months and still likes sleeeping on his side (think it means his thumb doesn't drop out)

my dd slept on her front from about 4 weeks. my hv was incredibly against it, and i really did try everything to get dd to sleep on her back, but really after the 10th night of baby waking every hour crying you need to do something. And for me it was putting dd on her front, where she still sleeps now (aged 14 months).

dd did have reflux which causs pain when she was on her back, but even reflux meds didn't help, perhaps some babies just like sleeping on their tums?

do whatever works for you, if your baby is in the room with you, and you're none smokers, you've already reduced the risks of cot death.

i'm not trying to tell you what to do, just lett ing you know that if you can live with the risks then go for it. i could, i did and to date dd is absolutely fine (touch wood)

I would try the swaddle quite tightly and put down on side, you can roll up a towel so dc doesn't roll on to the front?

One of my DT's would ONLY settle on her front, so that's how she got put down.

But I never told anyone as you are NOT ALLOWED to do this.

She co-slept and still settles on her front at 16 mths.

have you tried putting her on her side - with padding from towels or something to stop her rolling over - if you can't try that I also was big fan (and still am) of the tummy sleeping method that book thief recommends

have you tried putting her on her side - with padding from towels or something to stop her rolling over - if you can't try that I also was big fan (and still am) of the tummy sleeping method that book thief recommends

Lots of good advice on here.Have to say that my ds2 [19 months now]slept on his front.My ds1 [now 9]slept in his carseat in his cot for 2 months!.

Oh and we did what bookthief did too for a few weeks and he still sleeps in our bed sometimes.

My cousin died of cot death on his side, - it is not as safe as sleeping on their backs. But it is really hard when they won't sleep on their backs I know (my DS wouldn't either so I did what bookthief did and slept with DS face down on my chest).

All you can do is find out as much as you can about what the risks are and then make your own decisions. If you are non smokers and your DD is asleep in the same room as you all the time, and the room is not too warm etc then some of the risks are minimised. You have to make your own decision on this and many other things to come in parenting. It's not easy is it?

provinciallady makes a good point but dd would usually roll onto her back after a few minutes -it was just a good well of making her feel more settled.

My DD2 slept mostly on her front but that was for medical reasons - however we had one of those sensor pad alarms under the mattress which was very reassuring.

Think that the reason they say not to sleep on their fronts is a combination of them more likely to fall nto a deep sleep and they can 'forget' to breathe and they can overheat as they can't loose heat from their tummy.

That said I admit I co-slept with DD on my chest for the first 4 mths cos that was the only way she would sleep.

Now at 11mths she will only sleep on her right side!

Both my Dc's are front sleepers(from the off)as am I and they do say that it usually runs in families. For Ds I didn't worry too much about it as that was just how he settled, but 8 years on, I put Dd on her front(again the only way she'd sleep)but I have an Angel Care monitor, which gives me peace of mind whilst she sleeps. She should only need it for a few more months when she turns two.

I read somewhere that it's the MOVING from front to back sleeping that confuses the inner ear and can cause cot death.

So if your babe sleeps on front just make sure that that is the way she always sleeps.

FWIW most american babes sleep on their fronts.
Smoking is a far greater risk.

If your babe sleeps on her front then lucky you and leave her to it!

I understand exactly your worry.

With our first dc, dh & I would try all sorts to get him to sleep on his back, but he was a sicky baby and he found it too uncomfortable to lie on his back.

We tried warming his cot with a hot-water bottle, put dh's tshirt in with him, tilted moses basket at an angle, propped him on his side. We even, for a while, used to put him on his front to get him to sleep and then once fast asleep, very, very gingerly turn him over. But 30mins later he'd be awake. He took the decision out of our hands at about 11 weeks when he could roll over himself, so no matter how many times he was tuned over, he'd invariable be on his front within 5 minutes. Eventually we just learnt to relax.

With no 2, we've just accepted she sleeps on her front. We don't have heating on at night, she was in the same room as us, we don't smoke.

Breadandroses, there is no rule that says it is 'not allowed'. You parent the way you want to parent and provided you aren't drugging your kids to get them to sleep, putting them down to sleep on their fronts is perfectly reasonable IMO/E. That is the only way my two would sleep at all and be comfortable. Unfortunately, babies can die in any position, but you do what you think is right and works for you and your babies.

Putting babies on their side with rolled up towels or blankets raises their body temp and that can be dangerous.

Thank you for all your comments. I have to say I thought I'd get a lot of negative responses to my suggestion of putting DD on her tummy so sleep and it has been great to hear so many of your opinions.

We are still experimenting and hoping she will find her comfort soon.

It's really hard, especially when you're so sleep deprived yourself. The latest research on SIDS has revealed that there is a susceptibility in some infants for SIDS (something to do with the brainstem if I recall) and if those infants are put on their front or exposed to other factors such as smoking or overheating then they may succumb to SIDS. There is no way of knowing if your child has a predisposition or not.

I'm a huge fan of swaddling and have had success with 3 babies, but it's a hard slog and not instant and I hate to say this but at 4 weeks it's not going to be happening too easily. Our last baby slept with me tummy to tummy until 8 weeks.

As far as settling an infant in general I'm a HUGE fan of The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp. It saved me on my last 2 babies. It basically works on the principle that babies are born too early and there should be 4 trimesters instead of 3. Compared with other species, human babies are completely and utterly dependant on their mothers for a very long time. The principle he works on is that this 4 trimester is the first 3 months of the babies life in which you basically mimic the womb, swaddling, sucking, swinging, shhhhing done in a particular order. Couldn't say enough about his method and it really worked for me and helped calm my babies and help them sleep longer. Here's a link to his book on Amazon
www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_b_0_13?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=the+happiest +baby+on+the+block&sprefix=The+Happiest+

There's also a really good CD that demonstrates the method. Good luck

sorry not got time to read all thread so apologies if I repeat anything already written

I slept both of mine on their front as I couldn't cope with no sleep, I swaddled them for first few weeks (7 for ds1 and 4 for ds2) and it helped loads so I'd recomend it, I put them on their backs but it didn't work for us and like you they would only sleep on their fronts on our chest.

The guidelines are because they fall into a deeper sleep and as newborns have irregular breathing patterns and the deeper sleep means they are less likely to rouse themselves, one of the reasons they should be in the same room as you is so they are disturbed by you and 'learn' how to regularise their breathing.

I was a baby in the 80's and then the guidelines where to put your baby on their front BUT less houses had the effiecient central heating and insulation our modern houses have which adds to babies not being able to rouse themselves

The most important thing is to do what feels right for you - with ds1 I NEVER told anyone I slept him on his front, it was against guidelines and I didn't want to be made to feel like I was being wholey irresponsible, I had PND on his front meant sleep and I was less of a danger too him - an extreme view I know but it worked for us, luckerly when we did put him on his front my mum said 'thank goodness for that, I always knew he was better on his front, he'll choke on his back you know'