I think my baby hates me. HV suggests Cranial Osteopath - does it work ?

[DefNotYummyMummy]

My baby is 6 weeks old. She suffers usually at the same time of night and cries and feeds on and off the breast and punches me with her little fists, and kicks relentlessly for a few hours (6pm-11pm) until she passes out. I think it is trapped wind, but she burps beautifully and has some explosive farts/poos - sometimes after this crying episode before she passes out. I feel frustrated as I can't help her, but the way she glares at me I think she hates me anyway. Can this osteopathy actually help her, or will she grow out of it at 3/4 months anyway ? Any ideas ?

I don't know about Cranial osteopathy from a personal point of view, but I had a similar experience with my DD, so I know how heartbreaking it is to feel the way you do, as I felt exactly the same.

DD was very colicky (for up to 7-8 hours a day), and would not let me comfort her. If I tried to give her cuddles to soothe her she just fought me off. She used to look at me as if she was thinking 'You're useless mummy - why aren't you making it stop.'

She is now 4 and we are close as can be and she tells me she loves me about 3 times a day , so it will blow over.

Assuming it is tummy trouble, try gripe water, infacol and colief. If you find the last 2 work you should be able to get them on prescription from your GP, to save buying them yourself.

I really feel that with some babies it's just sheer frustration that they can't communicate or get their bodies to do what they want them too.

Bear in mind it may take the full 4 months to completely right itself and it will feel like forever while you are going through it. I know it is easier said than done, but try and get as much support as you can, and make the most of the good times, because those memories will be so special when she is a bit older. I know because I have so few of them myself having got so stressed out and depressed with the situation.

I would also recommend trying baby massage, and if it all gets too much for you there is a helpline - CRY-SIS, for parents of colicky babies 08451 228 669 or www.cry-sis.org.uk

Hope this helps a bit and that you and your DD are getting on better very soon

My first one cried like that every evening too. Pretty much as soon as DH got home from work until about midnight - he began to think it was all his fault, poor sod. But miraculously one night it stopped. Second baby did same but only for a couple of weeks and third who is now 7 months not at all.

Think cranial ost. is great though - helped my son settle at night (two sessions) - he was dropped on his head by midwife at birth (!) And my DD1 was going to be operated on for blocked tear duct but took her to the place I mention below and that sorted it. I have had it too, as have many friends. Would try it but might not work miracles.

If you are near London or Manchester look up the Children's Osteopathic Centre - they were fantastic. Also you don't have to pay - you make a donation if you can afford it because that is how they survive. We paid £30 but some pay more and some pay nothing. They also check out new mums and pregnant women.

www.fpo.org.uk

PS It will get better - my DD looked as if she hated me too but soon your baby will be smiling and adoring you. Hang in there!

Sorry - just read Donkeyswife and I have repeated what she said.

I cannot recommend CO enough! My daughter was a quick birth at the end however she was pushed back in (!!YES!) as the cord was around her neck. We didn't realise the damage this caused her. I read an article in Junior Mag- thank god - it changed her life & was like a miracle. She suffered constantly from colds, red blotchy cheeks a health review advised us to see a hearing specialist who wanted 8 weeks course of antibiotics followed by gromits, saying she was deaf! We knew she wasn't and I refused, we found a wonderful cranial osteopath who explained pushing her back had trapped her natural immunity glands just below her neck. Her first visit was amazing she was about 12 mths and you could see the relief from her instantly - a few more visits and she was fine - although I do think we should follow up at some point! Amazing!

Must agree Cranial is great, my osteo makes a fortune out of me! I have hands on, but cranial if I'm to tender (for my SPD in pregnancy), but als took my son for cranial after a forcep birth.

One thing - they warned me he'd be a bit out of sorts for a while after, he started shreiking almost as soon as we were home and it went on for a few hours, but within two days he was so much more relaxed than before.

at the "hating" you, if felt this whenever I breastfed unsuccessfully but think it's a bit of blues mixed with the natural motherly tendency towards guilt! Not everything is your fault hon...

Only just seen this thread, and would second giving it a go. DS2 had terrible colic, and would have this heart-rending pleading look in his eyes each evening: "Please help me, Mummy, PLEEEEASE!", his little eyes used to say. It was awful . I was very sceptical about CO, believing it to be a load of hocus pocus hippy nonsense, but after a few weeks of DH working away every night, and me trying to put crying DS1 to bed (who was just over 2 at the time), and settle a screaming DS2, and me crying with exhaustion and stress, I was willing to give anything a go.

I'd noticed that DS2 would always settle to sleep (Hah! Well, not settle, exactly. More like fall into an exhausted sleep about 10.30pm) with his head always flopping to the same side. After the first session of CO, there was no evening screaming that night, he just fell asleep in my arms (really felt like a miracle at the time, I can tell you!). Also, he had the biggest poo you've ever seen during or straight after the session (the osteopath said that might happen and was a good sign). After the next session, 2 weeks later I must admit he was suddenly worse than he'd ever been. It was very frightening that night, trying to comfort him and get him to sleep - the amount of pain that he seemed to be in. BUT, and this is a HUGE "BUT", the next morning I had to wake him up (he usually woke me), and I found him with his head TO THE OTHER SIDE!!! For the first time since he'd been born. I can only assume that the CO had realigned some trapped nerve in his neck and the screaming session the night before had been him readjusting to that. He was due to have a third session, but to be honest, at 30 quid a pop, I just couldn't afford it, and as it seemed to have rectified his "head to one side only" problem, I kind of thought I'd ride out thbe last few weeks of colic (he was by this time about 10 weeks old). His colic was improved by this time, but he was still very whingey generally so I think a third session would have been beneficial. But, as I say, I was just so astonished to see him holding his head in a relaxed way both sides. (DS1 has a noticeable flat spot on his head, even though he is now 5, becuase he would only ever sleep one side too). DS2 does not have a flat spot, and I'm convinced it was the CO that helped with that.

I am very to see other mums who just have these angel babies that just sigh and fall sleep peacefully without screaming (my sister's second baby was like that, whilst her first had the whole screaming colic thing going on so she KNOWS it's not just the way you parent them). I really think that CO should automatically be performed on newborn babies on the NHS - it would save parents a lot of heartache. It's really not mumbo jumbo.

Love, a former sceptic!

cranial osteopaths do not work in the same manner as conventional osteopaths (although they are usually trained for both) so you need have no worry about your DD's neck. DS benefited enormously from having cranial osteopathy and still does (11mo) although he only goes now when he reaches a new developmental stage - so he is due another visit now as he has just started walking.

It is a great therapy.

Nothing but good to say about CO here as well. Many of my friends have used it to help colic/sleeping issues/reflux etc etc

My ds goes once a fortnight as the CO is using him as a sort of study - he sleeps appallingly and although the CO has not yet "fixed" him he does make him happy each treatment.

If you are anywhere near Nottingham I would recommend Chris Stapleton at the Wellington Circus practice.

Both ds's and I have benefitted from CO.

Ds1 couldn't move his neck to the left so couldn't bf very well. Ds2 again had a stiff neck and my sacrum popped out of alignment when pg.

DS's 1&2 both had 3 sessions and I had 2. Well worth the money.

All of mine have had CO after birth and it helped tremendously - it's certainly worth you giving it a try. Good luck.

Our first born was a ventouse birth that is he had to be pulled out using a device attached to his head by suction. This left his head with a raised disk which eventually went away. However, no one told us including doctors, nurses and midwives that we should have got Cranial Massage for this. We had a terrible first months of a very upset baby. We did not know what to do - the midwife on visits was useless when it came to his crying. It was that bad my wife sometimes just had to walk away as she was at the end of her teather with lack of sleep and constant crying. It was only a year later that in a passing conversation someone mentioned about cranial problems. I realise now that lying him down at night was putting more pressure on an already sore head. However, he is now 5 and is having learning problems. I was at a parents evening and mentioned to his form teacher about his birth. She said that we should look into Cranial Massage as she had seem a similar case of a childs behaviour being affected by a difficult birth misshaping the head.

Ohhhhh lovey ,of course your baby doesnt hate you .

You grew her you care for her and you love her.

Are you going to give the osteopathy a try?.

It will be ok Im sure,it all sounds dreadfully sad for you at this point.

Fuck it Im gonna hug you ((( U )))

We have used cranial osteopathy for both DDs - DD1 when she was 2/3 weeks old as she was a forceps delivery and the MW said it might be a good idea, DD2 at about 4/5 mo as she has a strange shaped head and favours one side. I used one who came on a personal recommendation (as there seem to be some out there who aren't great, so best to use someone that has been recommended).

It has worked a treat with sleeping and I cannot praise ours highly enough - best money we've ever spent.

Cranial Osteopathy is fab and has worked really well on two of my kids. If I had known about it with my first I would have taken her there and not suffered from the vile colic as much.

Your baby doesnt hate you please dont think that. My mum used my dislike of her (which apparently I showed at birth) as an excuse for years for some pretty bad behaviour and coming from a child who was told this it took me years to get over it and realise babies just dont behave that way.

Babies fuss, cry, and are generally miserable from about 6pm. Thankfully, this phase passes after the first couple of months.

There is absolutely zero scientific evidence for cranial osteopathy. Personally, I would not, in a million years, let anyone prod my tiny baby's skull.

By the way, DD was born with one plate of her skull noticeably overlapping with the other behind her head. Her pediatrician said it would be a very bad idea to try to manipulate these plates and to let them grow into place.

I forgot to say that if you observe your baby being "calmer" and more sleepy, that might be for undesirable reasons.

A friend of my mother's overheard one nanny telling another on the bus about sticking a needle into a baby's fontanelle to make them sleep (She followed her to her place of work and told the family)

Obviously CO is not the same thing, but I would be worried if my baby suddenly started to sleep more/quicker after someone applied pressure to various parts of her malleable skull.

Try

• Infacol
• Dentinox for colic
• Carrying her in a sling
• Driving her in the car
• Vibrating swing/bouncer
• Gripe water (when she is old enough)
• Cutting all dairy out of your diet whilst breastfeeding (painful but possible as I did it for 6 months and seemed to help a bit, if you need milk I found oat milk the nearest thing which was bearable)
• Warm bath for her followed by holding her feet up to her tummy with her knees bent froggy to try to encourage her to pass wind

And lastly

• Just holding her and having faith that she will grow out of it at around 4 months, very difficult to live through i know from personal experience but try to remember she is in pain and is not having any feelings or thoughts about you or your ability as a mother (that is all your own thoughts in my experience)

Cranial osteopathy helped calm my terribly colicky baby. There was no direct manipulation of the head, more from the bottom and she visibly relaxed during the very gentle treatment. The CO was based within a GP surgery which helped my confidence.

However, before you go I would make an appointment to see 1. your GP to rule out reflux which can be successfully medicated and to ensure any appointment is with a good CO 2. a breastfeeeding counsellor as colic in BF babies can often be resolved by helping the latch and ensuring the baby is taking anough hindmilk.

Poor you, I do sympathise. It does pass as everyone has said on here but it really can cloud those first few months when you feel so knackered and vulnerable.

Just realised this thread is 2 years old!! OP- hope your toddler is no longer colicky?!