Should I be teaching dd (4.5) what to do in an "emergency" ? And how.

[PortoTreasonandPlot]

DH has gone a work trip for a couple of days and I'm always a bit nervous when he's away for more than one night, in case something "happens" to me eg a fall/collapse/sudden illness. I worry about dd being frightened etc - (though i think she could find enough food and water not to starve, and would probably even feed the cat.)

I told my colleagues at work that I was on my own and if I did a no show to be concerned about me - but they looked at me like I was quite mad. (Despite a guy at work slipping in to diabetic coma when his wife was away - and had lain there for 3 days before they found him!)

So I'm sure I'm just a bit paranoid, but it occurred to me that maybe i should have a chat with dd about what to do if something happened ie go next door for help or something. But she's a bit sensitive and i don't really want to frighten her with what probably is an unlikely scenario and the fact that she's be all on her own....IYSWIM

I guess plenty of you are on your own the whole time, so i wondered what you'd do, if anything?

What do you think's going to happen?! I'm on my own a lot, and have been since DS was born as DH's away working a lot. I used to worry when he was tiny, but now to be honest, I worry more about him getting lost when we're out. Mine can open the front door, and knows the neighbours (sounds like your little one does too), so I'm sure he'd sort it somehow. If you're that worried, why not talk about something easy to understand and non-scary - eg: if you fell and twisted your ankle. That way she'd have it in her head what to do if she needed to go and get some help for you, but wouldn't be scared by the suggestion.

Can you arrange for somebody to call you at a certain time of day, who will come round and check up if you don't answer, perhaps?

I'm not sure WHAT I think is going to happen - I think I'm a bit neurotic probably. The story about my work colleague has made me feel a bit worse - he's lucky to still be alive! Moved far away from home so don;t really have anyone who could check on me. I like the twisted ankle scenario - very non-threatening. Thank you!

Does dh not call you ?

do you have speed dial? my dd is 3 and a lot, and knows that in 'special circumstances', dh is number 1, grandma is 2 etc..?

Can you teach her how to phone her grandparents? It could give her an entertaining pastime so you can enjoy a lie in of a weekend morning, and if she was ever actually worried about you she could call them.

x post luminarphrases

Very tricky. DH decided to tell our five year old what to do if the smoke alarm went off (i.e. get out of the house as quick as possible and take her little sister with her). But she was smart enough to work out that he was implying that something bad might have happened to us, and got quite upset.

I like the idea of teaching how to phone for help. DD1 is now six and I guess we ought to teach her that. In fact, her best friend's mum is the top one in the address book, and she lives round the corner, so maybe we'll start there.

I haven't really thought about this either and I am on my own a lot with 3 DC.

We have started talking to DD (4.5) about fire alarms (get out and stay out) and we have always told the children that if they get lost to find a mummy with children because she will know what to do.

DS couldn't understand why a man wouldn't be so good but has seemed happy with the answer that mummies know best!

When my DH is away I arrange to speak to my mum on the phone twice daily, so if i was in a coma/dead she would know fairly quickly, and the kids wouldnt be alone for days.

Haven't got anything set up on speed dial but I might do that. Trouble is we're a different country from family so no-one is exactly on the doorstep. Could add a couple of local friends I suppose - but they can't guarantee to be in the country either...

Maybe that's why it bothers me. I feel a bit isolated here so apart from work, no-one would be concerned if they didn't set eyes on me / hear from me from day to day. Even the school would just assume dd was sick. I used to worry when we first left dd with the babysitter here what would happen in we had an accident whilst out. No-one to step in and take over IFYWIM....

Part of me feels silly for worrying, but I hate the idea of dd being left frightened.

We've taught DS(6) his dads mobile phone number and told him if he ever gets lost or somethings wrong to ring it. Proved extremely useful when I got locked in the bathroom!!

LOL!

am trying to teach my five year old how to dial 999 at the moment...but he's not really twigging yet

Yes! - this used to bother me a lot when the DC were small and DH was away, and work totally undestood why if I went AWOL for any reason they should call the cavalry - and my boss was completely understanding, and said he would personally call round if I did not check in. I also tole the cleaner, my parents etc for the same reason... No the DC have theor own phones with ours and realtives numbers in I have relaxed a bit... (BTW an ex-colleague of mine fell down the stairs in his house, died, and was not found for two weeks , so the banal CAN lead to tragedy...0

I am on my own with dc often, dd is disabled, so we all rely on ds being ok.
I have stuck a post it note on the back of the understairs cupboard with useful numbers, eg 999, the inlaws, dhs mobile number, and ds, now 6, knows to ring 999 if I he can see i am hurt/non responsive, or if he smells smoke, hears the fire alarm.
Apart from when I have burnt the toast, obviously, and he can see that we are all ok.
Have done this since he was 4, as I don't want him to feel vulnerable or entirely dependent on me

MrsGhoul!