Can't cope

[astragirl]

Hello. We have a 9 month old ds. Everyone is normally ok and lovely, but lately he's been really screaming, probably because of teething or because he gets bored or frustrated. This is starting to drive me crazy and I'm feeling really low. My dp wants us to have another baby, but I don't think I could go through this again, I'm used to a quiet life and am not very maternal. Whilst I do love my son and it's so lovely when he's happy and chatty, it really grates on my nerves when he's miserable and shouty. I don't know what to do

It's not you astragirl. I've had two. And one of the children was definitely harder than the other one. One of them came out of the womb crying pretty much! I was always thinking, colic? teething? growing pains???!!!

I'd tell your husband that your will start ttc when he's about 2 and 3 months, as even the grizzliest child does start to get easier by 3!!

Don't be talked into having a second yet!! You need to get used to being a mother, which is a big deal in itself really, especially if the baby isn't a 'text book baby' (sorry to quote gina ford!). My second wasn't either. He was only ever happy if I was carrying him.

Some days are harder than others. I bet you've just had a particularly rotten day today.

Hi Astragirl, I almost posted the same thing!! I have a 9 month old DD and she is a nightmare, always miserable or wanting attention , her mind is ahed of her body and she is teething badly but its wearing me down. My DS who is 3 now was not like that and its very tiring. Don't let it put you off having another, but i can tell you i had a very easy first baby but was still not ready for another until he was 16 months old at least!! .

I think its a very frustrating time for them at this age, he will change and be much easier when he can walk and talk etc it seems right now that it will last forever but it wont!. I really am down about my DD but as she is a second baby i know it will get easier.

I think i am going to take her to cranial osteopathy as it really calmed my DS down loads but i went with him when he was only a few weeks old.

I do emphasise with you, My DD has been like this from 6 months old!!

G

It gets better.

If it is teething I assume you have tried Calpol? What about a sling if he just needs to be carried and cuddled all the time and you have stuff to do?

It gets better, I promise it does. It has taken me 4 years to get to the point where I want another. There is no ideal age gap but you absolutely should not be pushed into another until you are ready.

It gets better.

Do whatever works, I know there is stuff that needs to get done, but if you can, snuggle up with him in bed - if you breastfeed, try that. TV is not the enemy, even at 9 months he might be interested in the colours and that will give you 10mins peace. Mum reckons she used to put the washing machine on and put us on that (whilst holding of course) and the movement was soothing - though I think it was a top loader.

The Ergo backpack carry is particularly good for babies - they can see the world around them and you have your hands free.

It gets better.

Thank you all for your replies. I guess it doesn't really help that he's not a good sleeper and we're stressed because we'll all soon be moving house. I do love being a mum but find all the screeching hard to deal with, but as Morloth says "it gets better", that I look forward to.