Do all four year olds whine in woods?

[Leda]

We have just moved from a city to a village with our house being opposite a small, but rather lovely wood.

When I take my four and a half year old dd to go look at some autumn leaves or to hunt for bugs, mushrooms or even fairies in the wood she WHINES. Non-stop. No fun is had by anyone except maybe her baby sister who sleeps through all of it.

Dd1 says: This is not fun for me! I don't like walking in woods! This is not what children like to do!

I think she is spoilt and that she doesn't know what fun is unless it is so clearly signposted as such (carousel, pink icecream) that it looses almost any appeal to anyone more sophisticated than a five year old. I want to do things that I think we should all be able to enjoy.

Dh thinks I am expecting too much and offered to take dd1 to the local tacky seaside resort next Sunday leaving me and the baby to explore the wood in peace (or even to experience the highly sophisticated pleasure of a lie in).

This is tempting, but I feel uneasy about it. Like I am letting my daughter down by not showing her how to enjoy the wood, the countryside, the river, the lakes etc. etc. All the things we are here for rather than back in the city.

Who is right?

If I drag dd1 into the wood enough times, will she begin to like it?

Do other four year olds like woods or is it their parents who like them?

Am I making a big deal out of nothing?

we call ds4 'Goat' because he runs about on Moorland like montain goat

My DD was scared of woods at that age. As we entered them you could see her slow down and fearfully looking around her and wouldn't be happy until she was out of them.

I like woods, as long as they are on the other side of a lovely picture window and there is plenty of hot tea to enjoy looking at them through.

My DH & DS however love being out and about and getting mucky in the trees. Maybe she just doesn't like it?

God I used to HATE going for walks. I couldn't see why my friends, who by my parent's standards were skint, got taken to Ingoldmells and came back dizziy from funfairs and sick with candyfloss, and we got taken to Wales, which had sheep, grass and sand.

"The best things in life are free" - yes they are, if (and I have said this before) you are a 36 year old administrator who enjoys a nice glass of wine, a rocket salad, a walk around a fascinating Victorian house or a beautiful deciduous forest. NOT if you are aged between 3 and 18. Children like flashing lighted, tacky tunes, honking noises, being whirled around at high speed, sugar, salt, fat and crunch, and staying up uch later than iss good for them. It's our duty as parents to gently steer them away to cheaper more adult pass times, but they don't naturally prefer them, no, not even well brought up ones

When 'nice' parents accept this, and stop punishing themselves for not introducing nice woods, rocket salad, and fruit picking earlier, they and their children will be much happier.

Yeah, mine moans on walks. I remember moaning on walks as a kid ' What is the pointof going for a walk just for the sake of it and not to get anywhere????'

DON'T MIND IT now but still don't see much point unless exersising a dog or something. Get a dog maybe then she will be able to play chase with it?

Mine did. I persevered and made sure the whining filter was well fitted. It passed.

Leda, it is a legless lizard not snake. They are beautiful and sadly getting more unusual there were hundreds of them (ditto, lizards, newts etc) when I were a nipper.

Yes Marmaduke. I needed to move one once as it was sun-bathing in the road. It dropped the end of its tail off (a neat trick of theirs), slithered away and the tail bit kept wriggling for about 20 mins (iirc).

The idea is the predator concentrates on the wriggling tail and the slow worm gets away.

Clever eh?

I'm not convinced that young children don't naturally like outdoor things. My dds do like theme parks and candy floss and soft play, but they also, probably equally, like the forests and beaches and rivers and farms. my 4yo has gone on and on abou the night we spent this summer camping wild on Dartmoor (by a stream for damming and paddling and crossing by stepping stone, with ponies around). She adored it.

And my 6yo has been known to comment (SMUG MUMMY ALERT) that the local theme park could get a bit boring if you went to often and she liked the forest better.

my dds also love kayaking and sailing and building sandcastles and other outdoor things, partly because DP and I do all that but not solely because we've forced them into enjoying things on our terms.

I've always loved the woods, spent my whole childhood in them, sometimes all day.
This time of year is not the best, except for jumping in piles of leaves.
Autumn is best in an Ash woodland after a few days of dry sunny weather, then you can make massive piles of dry leaves and jump in them!
Spring is the best around April as you can have a look at all the flowers coming up and also look for birds nests (but don't disturb). Early summer is best for den making out of fallen branches and bracken and you could spend all day there making a little camp and bring along a frying pan and cook some bacon and make toast.
This is what my brother and i used to do when we were around 11yrs old.
Look for slow worms under any large flat objects on the ground/grass. If you have a small stream or little pond look for tadpoles and make corrals for them.
Find interesting fallen trees and climb them, make an assault course.
Also just sit still and listen to the birds and animals.
They will enjoy it eventually, they just need to tune in to diferent pace of life.

Thank you for all the suggestions.

I think she will probably like it more if she doesn't pick up that I am being pushy/anxious about it -- as I probably was this weekend.

Cadelaide, I bet that made you junp

Leda, I'm sure I'm teaching you to suck eggs BUT particularly at this time of year make sure DD is dressed warmly enough. You can always take bits off, but being cold will only increase the misery! My DS (4) loves wearing a rucksack as part of our exploring adventures, we then stuff any shed gloves/hats etc in there.

My dad used to take us on hikes and camping trips etc when we were small and we used to bleat and moan and whine the entire time. I really don't know why he perservered. But thank god he did. Those memories are some of the happiest of my childhood and I hope to offer my children somethign of the same. If we had been left to our own devices we would have done something ghastly like watch TV.

Sometimes parents really do know what's best ... I say to the OP persevere but gently following some of the excellent tips on this thread for making it fun!

god i loathed walks when young and delight in the fact my children are soooo unlike me