Night-time potty-training.... It can't just be hormonal as she wee'd in her nappy before even going to bed - what do I do?

[rainbowdays]

My nearly 4 yo daughter has been happily dry during the day for months now. I was assuming that her having soaking nappies each morning , was just a sign that she was not ready to be dry at night. I know there are people who say that it is a hormone thing and it happens in its own time.

BUT, on a few occasions now, once she was ready for bed with nappy on, the nappy was wet before she even got into bed! Her night-time routine includes a trip to the toilet. So there is no reason for her to be weeing in the nappy before going to bed.

Could this just a behavioural issue/ habit, and if so what do I do???? Advice please.

Well she's four years old so ask her! I would wager that she knows that it's okay to wee in a nappy (that's what it's for, right?) and if you want her to stop wearing a nappy at night, you can talk to her about it and try her in knickers with a waterproof mattress cover, maybe a towel on under her sheet, spare sheets near by, etc. and if she is ready, I bet it'll only be a night or two that she wets.

... assuming she doesn't have a drink before bed. My friend's DD wet every night despite being lifted and after months of anguish my friend had a lightbulb moment, realised it was the bedtime cup of water, took that away and she never wet again. She was 3 at the time.

ches thank you for your reply

I have tried talking to her about it, I have also tried bribery but to no avail, she promises to try not, then goes ahead and does it.

I will try again tonight with no nappy. Previously I have promised a treat if she stays dry, I will try the "you can't come swimming tommorrow if the wees don't go in the toilet tonight" instead, as I am wondering if motivation is her biggest issue here. She does not see it as important and it is not really yet as she is still young, but I really think she is capeable of being dry at night but choosing not to be.

I don't think you should punish (or threaten to punish) a child for weeing in a nappy. Nappies are for weeing in. She has been weeing in a nappy since the day she was born. Most 4yos don't have the cognitive development to process all the steps involved in reasoning from "I need to wee" all the way to "I can't go swimming." It's quite an abstract concept with at least 5 steps in the reasoning, including past, present and future conditions, which IMO is a bit much to ask.

Thank you ches for your advice, I unfortunately did not listen to it. But my tactic actually worked!!!! I was sure it was purely down to motivation, and it seems that I was right. I am not sure how we are going to maintain the motivation, and I am sure there will be some accidents yet to come, but it was the first time my daughter has actually really taken on the challenge.

She was really proud of herself this morning, I hope that she continues want to keep dry now.

I do appriciate that you took the time to advise me, and it did help me. I agree that most 4yo's could not grasp the concept of if you don't do this then, this will happen, but I knew that my dd understands this concept in a limited way and that she would be able do it if she really wanted to.

I guess tonight will show if she is ready to continue or not.

Thanks again

Oh I'm always happy to be wrong, especially when it works out well for you.

We're going through this too - I posted about this somewhere here. Seem that two steps forward one step back is about par for the course. We've had two wet nights hot on the heels of five dry ones.

It'll work out in time.

Top tip though: disposable changing mat between the sheet and the waterproof sheet. Saves you having to wash and dry the waterproof sheet which in my experience seem to take about a week to dry.

I have identical twin girls who are 4 yrs 6 mnths. Both have been dry through the night for about 6 monhts. They both started school in Sept and love every minute of it, however Mia was poorly for two days about 3 weeks ago (high temp no other symptons), and since then has been wetting the bed every night, sometimes 3 times a night. We have taken her to the docs - all fine. We have stopped giving her drink after 6pm. We have moved her old potty back into her room, but still we are not getting anywhere. We effectively ignore it, don't punish her, just get up when she crys out, change sheets and put her back to bed. Is it just a case of sitting it out, or is there something else we should/could be doing. Help?

Being ill always seems to result in a back track. What did you do to help her get there in the first place? Perhaps you should go back to the beginning.

A star chart with suitable small reward seems to work for us (sometimes).

It'll sort itself out though. It has too...