4 yr old won't take himself to toilet? should he?

[GREENY]

My DS has been potty trained for about a year, still has a few accidents
But he has never taken himself to toilet or pull his own trousers down, and WILL NOT hold his own widgy!! He will be starting school next year and I am not sure how to get him to do this?? any ideas

Bribes???

Do you use treats, or could you offer him treats when he goes on his own and holds his own willy?

Use a reward chart?

Not got any boys in our house but what about painting a ping pong ball, chucking it in lav and getting him to aim for one of those, he'd have to hold his willy then.

Can he watch your DH go to the loo as often as poss? Learn by Daddy's example?

What about letting him sit down to wee and he has to just hold his willy down, would that work???????????????

Why is it do you think that is stopping him gpoing on his own and holding his willy???

I have a ds who is a few months older than yours.

TC suggests letting him see daddy do a wee - that's what we did with ds - it does help. Does your ds have any friends who could demonstrate? (warning: it may become a habit!)

Also dh tells ds to make water music in the toilet!

But tbh you will just need to keep prompting adn praising him for now.

Yes I would rather he went with DH but he prefers me to take him, probably made a rod for my own back!!
The ping pong ball sounds like a good idea though, think i will try that one!! I'm sure he'd enjoy that game
And tried the sitting down, but again he never holds his widgy down so ends up soaked!

I think its just laziness, but he was a bit of a late developer, didn't walk till after he was 2 and his talking isn't fantastic but am getting extra help with this

My ds also verges on the late side for achieving the usual milestones. He wasn't toilet trained until he was nearly 3½ adn wouldn't poo in a toilet until fairly recently for example.

He will get there, course he will, but I'm sure the sooner the better for you esp with school approaching.

You can buy ready painted ping pong balls in the nappy section in Sainsburys but why waste money. Buy your owna nd paint them with felt tips together.

Have you bought potty / toilet training books? let him see pics of other boys doing it.

I'd work on getting him to hang out with daddy in the bathroom.

If he's standing at loo, as well as the ping pongs, home about putting a poster up on wall around loo, making it a nice place for him to be that he doesn't mind hanging out in.

If laziness is an issue, and it so often is with toilet training, I'd go for the treat thing. Amazing how the thought of an iced gem or the like will spur a person into doing something they didn't want to do a moment ago!

My DD used to love to wee for what she believed was a bit of chocolate (but it was actually half a dried prune each time!!!)

Did have some books but not a clue where they are, good idea though may get another with pictures in to show him, maybe he just doesn't understand what he has to do

And yes I think sometimes he finds it "boring" to go to the toilet and would rather be listening to his music, might get a portable CD put in there!!

I think he's a bit wise to the treat thing, though he does like getting stickers so might invest in some of those too!!

I appreciate all your advise on this!! I love this website!!