So what do you do when your kids repeatedly ignore you?

[RhubarbEatsBiscuitsOnTheBog]

You must have experienced this, you ask them to do something once, twice, three times and then finally when you yell at them they do it.

My dd has a habit of doing this just recently. I'm not sure it's all deliberate, I know she's dizzy. But it's really bloody annoying!

I just asked her, very clearly, to get changed. 10mins later she's still playing with her brother.

She's now in her room and is staying in there until I feel she can come out.

I'm interested to find out how everyone else deals with this.

I think that if time is an issue you have to be sure that you are giving off the right signals. If somebody tells DS to get his shoes on because we are about to leave, then heads off somewhere else and starts faffing, he receives the message that he has about another 5-20 minutes of play time. If on the other hand they look as though they are about to march out the door then he puts his shoes on.

Could you try not doing the yelling, just asking once and then letting her face the consequence? If you ask a child to do something several times and then always yell you are giving the message that until you start yelling it isn't important for them to do whatever you are asking. I'm not saying that I don't yell - just saying that I know I am contributing to my own downfall when I do this.

great so it doesn't get better as they get older!!!!!!!!!! i'm abit like you Elk!!!

I tell my DS1 that he will get no more tv for rest of day if he does not do as he is told as for him that is the worst punishment!

We've agree that I shall shout "This is a warning - I shall say this only once!" in a French accent. If they do not heed the warning they have to clean the toilet.

I like that solution - it has the added advantage of getting the chores done too. I'm quite keen on the electric fly swatter idea too.... My dd1 is just as bad (she's 6). We get the 'in a minute' response and also, irritatingly, 'oh, I forgot' when you remind her she's supposed to be putting her clothes on. How can you forget to put your clothes on, when you do it every morning? Drives me nuts. If we didn't live opposite school I swear we'd never get there.

Ugh. My DD is smaller (3.6) but she's driven me insane today with endless faffing (which I can just about cope with) and then ignoring me (which I just can't bare), so that I end up saying things 6 times, then screaming at her. I hit her today for the first time ever (a not very hard tap on the bum, but -for me- a line has been crossed).

I must take some time to remind myself of what I would like to do when she's ignoring me. Ignoring her back works wonders when i remember to do it, but sometimes you don't have the time to do that. And I really hate endlessly bribing her with treats/punishments. It's not the sort of parent I'd anticipated being.

hum.

Hollyhobbie, no wonder you feel like screaming if you are saying things six times! You need to find something that makes it happen before you've had to repeat yourself so much.

For the ignoring, are you sure she's hearing you? Have you tried making sure she has heard by asking her to acknowledge or repeat back "so what do you need to do now?"?

Then you don't need to give her so many chances to comply.

The faffing is inevitable at that age. They are sooo easily distracted.

But it can work for you. If I say to DD, 'time to get dressed' and she replies "this dinosaur is the mummy, this dinosaur is the daddy" I'll say "And which dinosaur is the baby" while pulling her pyjamas off.

what happens when she asks you for something or to do something for her and you reply with the "in a minute"? Months ago on one occassion I replied to my ds the same way he had spoken to me and he got grumpy Used it as an opportunity to talk about when we ask you to do something there is a good reason why, though if you have a problem with this speak up then sort of talk. It improved the situation a bit but find othersides tip of looking for acknowledging and repeating most useful.

Actually that's a good idea - getting them to repeat what you've asked them to do. It makes sure that they've heard and are paying attention.

Then if they fail to act, taze 'em.