Francophone babies in SE London

[ManIFeelLikeAWoman]

My daughter is 8 months old and, although I am a native English speaker, I have decided to speak to her only in French and have done since birth (I have near native competence). Her mum speaks to her only in English.

I am very happy with my decision but am also aware that my French is not perfect and probably never will be, if only because I'll never know those words and expressions you have to speak the language as a child yourself to pick up.

With this in mind, I'd really like her to socialise with other Francophone babies and toddlers - and at the same time, maybe I can benefit from socialising with their parents (how else will I learn how to tell her off without terrifying her when the time comes?) Does anyone know of any groups, formal or otherwise, in SE London where we can do this? Weekends would be ideal - we both work.

Not looking for French classes - just French-speaking play and (when the time comes) talk.

Any suggestions? Please do help a grateful dad.

Had not heard of the Australian guy who managed to bring his kids up bilingually in a non native language. We live in Spain and our oldest 2 DC are bilingual. Both DH and I are British but have friends where one partner is British and the other Spanish. It can be really tough for the 'minority' language speaker, and that's when it's their mother tongue.

Also, our eldest dd (aged 8) finds the whole bilingualism thing very embarrassing. I am sure she will get through this, and have no doubt that we are giving her an enormous gift. But she is at that stage when she doesn't want to be different.

For me, bilingualism is a fantastic opportunity. We moved to Spain largely in order to bring up our kids bilingually. I'm sure you have thought a lot about it, but I would say that no amount of language proficiency is more important than your relationship with your child. My German is pretty good - I lived there for a year and studied it at uni - but there is no way I could express myself well enough to communicate fully with my DC in it. Equally in Spanish, although I spend hours a day speaking it with Spaniards. Sorry. don't mean to pour cold water on your enthusiasm. Just trying to give you a realistic look at the road ahead.

Thanks again for advice. You're right, I have thought a lot about it. I am lucky to be in a similar position to Saunders in that I am a (former) university lecturer in my chosen language and taught two years in French unis too, so I am reasonably happy with my competence.

As for the relationship, you are dead right - and again, I bear out Saunders's experience (he has written two books about his experience, in which he answers most doubts, combining his 13 years' experience of raising bilingual children with the detailed recording skills of the professional linguist and linguistician which is his professional background) in finding that I actually make much more of an effort to be with my child, speak to her, and play with her than I otherwise would, precisely because I feel the responsibility of being the minority language parent - I feel pretty sure that I would have taken more of a back seat in deference to her mum if we were both speaking the same language. So I'm seeing a real plus in that respect too.

Well good for you. It's a lovely gift to give. Bumping for you in the hope you find some French speakers near you. Good luck

Thanks v. much - it IS hard sometimes to remember you're doing the right thing for the right reasons. All encouragement gratefully received!

S

Hello,
DH is French and speaks to DS (and to DC2 from Feb onwards) in French. Our children will be trilingue so there's a bit of a challenge there. We are in SE London and work too. If you want, I can speak to DH to see if you want to meet up for a play date in French one of these weekends...? Would be good for DS's French too...

Yes, that would be good and could definitely work for us - although bear in mind that our daughter is not yet speaking so, in one-to-one situations, might be necessary to wait a while or it could be frustrating for your son! (A friend in Marseille asked us to go and visit - I pointed out that his two year old daughter might get bored with a "playmate" who, at the time, was completely silent and immobile!)

Do you know anything about the saturday playgroup at Crystal Palace? Would love to take her to Blackheath Thursdays too but sadly my employers insist I turn up at their place some days ...

Well, DS is 17 months and not really speaking yet either... I'll ask DH to see what he thinks. I've just read about the playgroup at Chrystal Palace too. It would be a good idea but DH and DS already go to babyswimming classes on Sat mornings. Gosh, I sound like a pushy mum now, don't I

I FEEL like a pushy dad all the time. But then I think, well, if I don't make this happen, it's not going to happen, is it? I mean, I don't know about where you are, but our girl's not going to bump into many Francophones at Peckham Morrisons, is she? (Although, quite by chance, the very modest nursery she attends happens to have a woman from the Belgian Congo on the staff and two or three French African kids, so French-speakers don't just crop up in South Ken!)

Anyway, I'd certainly be happy for a meet when it looks fruitful for both sides. In the mean time, I'm hoping to take her to Palace this weekend so I'll let you know how it goes - I have to compromise with her mum, too, who thinks mum and baby dance classes are a much better use of saturday mornings ...

BTW how come trilingual - what's the tihrd language in the mix?

Just being nosey, I know.

I speak him Finnish, DH French and CM English. We speak French at home but as it's not my native language, am a bit nervous of DS picking up my funny accent

I have no experience here in terms of bringing up children, but in terms of being a child I remember that kids that moved to the area from elsewhere soon picked up the accent anyway ... In other words, your accent, even if it IS funny (and you may find that native speakers find it charming ...) will soon get overridden once your children mix more with other French-speakers.

You also might have noticed when you go in Indian or Pakistani family-owned shops, often the parents (who immigrated) still have strong Indian or Pakistani accents but their children, who were born here, have the local accent.

And, besides, it could be worse - he could have a Marseille or Nice accent ...

America, just got back from the Crystal Palace playgroup - v. good, recommend it if ever you decide not to do swimming on Saturdays.

Where's america these days?

(humorous answers on a postcard please ...)

Anyone out there?

Update for non-mathmos - daughter now 16 months, walking and producing a few words (mostly English but some French) so perhaps a slightly more attractive prospect for playdates than when I started this thread ...

Still going to playgroup in Palace - which I highly recommend - and now live in Palace too.

It's all gone quiet, so can I publicise my (higly relevant) new blog?

It's at

papaetpiaf.wordpress.com

and it's brand new.

Thoughts welcome.

S

I haven't been here for a while. Latest update: DD now 28MO speaks qutie fluently Finnish in full sentences, well English in short sentences and some French. He doesn't seem to mix the languages and knows who speaks which language. So far successful. Will check you blog MIFLAW.

Have you tried Cadet Rousselle www.cadetrousselle.co.uk. French speaking playgroup in London SE and SW for children 0 to 4 years old. Great for kids to socialise with other French Speaking kids. There is also a morning school available

Cadet Rousselle is a playgroup for French speaking parents and bilingual families - it enables children to learn how to play together in French. It is also a perfect forum for bilingual families generally to meet informally and make new local friends.

Cadet Rousselle's weekly sessions at the One O'Clock Clubs follow a structured programme of arts and crafts activities based on the French cultural calendar as well as songs and story-telling.

For more information please visit www.cadetrousselle.co.uk

Cadet Rousselle est un "playgroup" destiné aux parents francophones et bilingues qui veulent que leurs enfants (0-4 ans) puissent jouer, échanger et se tisser des amitiés en français.

Les sessions de Cadet Rousselle suivent un programme structuré d'activités créatives et manuelles basées sur le calendrier culturel français ainsi que des chansons et lecture de contes.

Pour plus d'information wwww.cadetrousselle.co.uk

One O' Clock Club Salters Hill - West Norwood, London, SE19 1EA - Lundi matin de 9h45 à 11h45
One O'Clock Club Triangle Balham - Tooting Bec Common, Off Emmanuel Road, London SW12 0PP - Vendredi matin de 10h00 à 11h30