Basically, my DD (7.5) has worn me out, she is such hard work, heres why...
Her dad and i split up at the end of the school term (July). We were supposed to be moving away, she left school and i left my job but out of the blue he left. She has only seen him once since then, although he has begun to keep in touch with her better this last week and he is visiting her this wk also. She became so upset about returning to her old school and made such a fuss that i decided to enroll her in another school. I wasnt sure how she was dealing with her dad leaving and thought that it was her way of dealing with things. It goes much deeper but im trying to be brief. My dd is very very deep and wont talk about anything at all. She will sit and ask questions and talk until 2am if i let her but she wont talk about herself or her feelings. Her reactions are always to cry out, scratch herself all over and say leave me alone, i dont feel well. Therefore, i have no idea whats going on in her head. Im exhausted with trying, with leaving it, with suggestions etc etc.
Every day in school she says she feels ill, (she did do this a fair bit in her old school, but not to this extent) Thing is, i actually think she MAKES her self feel ill! Its crazy! She is at home again with me today as she sobbed and sobbed in school and i had to ocme get her. Everytime she has to go to school, talk, do something she doesnt want to do, she make s such a fuss about not being well, cries, shouts works herself up etc. I KNOW she struggles with some things, she has pretty severe exzema and has just finished a course of steroids (the first time in years) but her skin hasnt improved...due to stress?
My dd wont talk, she is so unhappy, she is complaining of feeling ill al the time, she is either crying or shouting or scratching or rubbing...you get the picture!
Im goingto the drs with her today and i wanted her tested for everything, if the results come back negative for everything, do i say "ok, your not ill...get on with it"??? Why would she be saying, acting or living like this if she didnt beleive it herself?
Im hopless at trying to explain her ways and actions, but its just not right. Im a trainee teacher, im NOT soft or neurotic and have seen hundreds of children and worked with them as a ta for years and I dont remember ever seeing a child so complex before.
She has no concentration span and she needs constant attention from others. Today, in her school church service, there were 300 children and my dd was the only one not singing and looking miserable.
WHat do I do? Its not healthy for a child to be feeling like this but im lost with what to do....anyone help?