Older child pinching, help please.

[jennifersofia]

DD1 (2 yrs) is pinching baby (4 mths). I (naturally!) find this upsetting and it makes me quite angry. I try not to leave baby in vulnerable position, but being on my own with them most of the time, it does inevitably happen. I tell DD firmly it is not good, I am not happy with this, it hurts your sister, etc. but this hasn't helped. I do try to not make it into a big thing as the negative attention makes DD even more keen. Often happens during breastfeeding. Anyone else been in this situation, how did you deal with it? Advice in general? Thanks.

I haven't been in the situation that includes nipping, but dd1 is very very over protective of dd2 and is alway wanting to cuddle her to the point that dd2 starts screaming to get away, when she does dd1 then pushes her away and shouts at her. Have you tried getting a certain game, activity or video to start when you start feeding your young one, although i know from experience that 2 year olds have a very short attention span. Another thing i make my dd1 do when she has upset dd2 is apologise, i will not let her come into the same room as dd2 unless she apologises mainly so she knows that she was in the wrong, i know this is a different situation but i hope it helps somewhat.

ds2 was born when ds1 was 2 and a half. As ds1 is autisic we had limited ways we could communicate what was acceptable and what wasn't. (ie couldn;t go into explanations about hurting ds2 or anything). After a couple of weeks he tried an experimental hit or two. Each time I picked him up said "no" firmly and calmly and out him outside the room for about 30 seconds. He stopped after a day. Now the only time he hits ds2 is if he is crawling up the stairs- but the stairs are very special to ds1 so I just say "no hitting" and then remove ds2 (actually try to keep him off the stairs anyway). he's also tried to thow a 90 year old lady of the stairs and any books/clothes etc get thrown off as well. HTH