An objective view on this pre-school report please?

[schneebly]

Quick background - DS2 is 3.5y and has been attending this pre-school 2 mornings per week since January. Got the report today which says;

x has only been attending pre-school for a short time. He is a confident boy who enjoys pre-school and mixes well with other boys in the group.

On occasions x needs to be reminded of appropriate behaviour as he can be quite boisterous.

x is keen to try new activities but particularly enjoys playing with the cars and the train track, although at times he finds it quite difficult to play cooperatively with others.

We are sure that x will settle easily into his new Nursery class.

I agree with most of what they are saying but I feel it is a little negative - surely most 3 year olds occasionally struggle with playing cooperatively? Could they not have said more nice things about my lovely boy?

I'm being precious about my baby aren't I?

Er yes

It seems very honest, I'd far rather have that than a report about a paragon of virtue I didn't recognise.

BTW it sounds exactly like the one I got for ds2 when he left playgroup

I'm afraid you are. It is a fair report and in the long term you may well thank them for their honesty as it is making you aware that ds2 is not the best at sharing and playing with his peers.

None of us are perfect and I think they could have taken the easy path and given him a glowing report that doesn't really tell you what you need to hear.

I think it is nice - they have honest in a positive way. They have said nice things - its just your focusing on the negatives.

I would have a loved a report like that about ds. Re his actual behaviour I mean.
His was so wishy washy and the same as half the kids in his class. It was full of 'he can write numbers 1-20' etc.
They are not allowed to say anything negative .

He's 5.5 by the way

I knew I was being precious but you just want everyone to think they are as wonderful as you do Yes he is a bit exciteable and boisterous and he sometimes struggles to share but he is also funny and sweet and I love him.

I think it is fair enough, but could have concluded with a more positive and warmer comment.

Something like:

'he is also the loveliest little boy we have ever met and we think you are the luckiest and best mother in the world to have such an adorable son.'

I always wonder if school staff have Really noticed how gorgeous my boys are. My Dad told me quite seriously 'of course they have, they are just being professional and so can't say so.'

He is as besotted and deluded as me!

Sorry, just re read my message. My sentance with the face at the end wasn't aimed at your OP. It was my thoughts on the fact that ds's school isn't allowed to write anything negative.

exactly!!!!!

it's ok mel - I got that

"you just want everyone to think they are as wonderful as you do."

Not really - you want the appropriate people to point out how they can become better, whilst of course fully acknowledging strengths.

yes of course liz But he is wonderful just a typical 3 year old in many ways! He will become 'better' at sharing and cooperating with others as he matures and develops.

I hate these reports! Ours have been the same every six months since my son started. This most recent one condescended to say that he didn't join in group activities as much as he could do. (he's 2.5) And when he was 1 they were saying 'we will encourage him to be more confident with his walking' as if that wouldn't happen automatically!
Why they can't say 'he loves hugs' or 'the nape of his neck is particularly delicious', I don't know.

Message withdrawn

reports at pre school fgs

All of my DS2 pre school reprts contained the phrase

'he enjoys wearing a variety of hats'

Do you think they were stuck for something to say?

we think that will really amuse him when older.

They have to find something positive to say but also 'targets' to be working towards. It often makes schol reports seem sterile imo.