8 year old wallflowers at the gym

Our leisure centre has a creche. That's`the good news. The bad news is that it only caters for 5 year olds and under, except for one measly evening a week when a playclub runs in the indoor soft play area.

It's the flagship leisure centre in the borough with lots of facilities. I enjoy going there for a swim or a class. I try to go three times a week - the recommended minimum number of times to exercise, I believe. (I often don't make my target - I'm not super fit). I'm lucky in that I can exercise alone during school and nursery hours.

Now what happens to parents who want to keep fit, do their three bouts of exercise a week, but have children over 5? OK if you can slip off during the day minus children, but increasing numbers of parents with school aged children work. If you aim to exercise in the evening after work, child care is available for only one evening a week.

I have already run into difficulties with my 8 year old. Too old to join his brother in the creche, he is also not allowed to sit quietly in the gym while I do a class. We tried this but another woman complained - my ds was giggling and playing up and I think she and others felt uncomfortable exercising in front of an 8 year old boy. Other children don't wait for their parents in the classes either - it is not really allowed. For the same reasons he is not welcome to wait in the women's changing rooms (and I'm sure he'd be mega embarassed to be there). So the only place he can wait is in the cafe next to the gym and in view of me, mostly. It can get busy, and it is open to the public, so there are risks. I trust him to be sensible and he sits there quietly doing his homework etc for an hour. However I certainly wouldn't leave a 6 year old alone there. When his brother is too old for the creche I don't know what I will do.

Despite the lack of supervised facilities for over 5 year olds, 8 year old swimmers are allowed to go to the pool and changing rooms alone. Since I feel my son can't swim well enough to be safe, and I don't like the idea of him being totally alone in the changing rooms (I wouldn't be in calling distance) I won't allow him to do this. However I have run into difficulties leaving my son alone in the cafe, which is in view of me when I do a class. Once at reception I was told that no under 16 year old can be left alone in the cafe and they refused us entry!! Talk about double standards - for 8 years that same 16 year old could have been swimming alone in the pool.

I have taken all this up with the manager of the leisure centre. He phoned me and we had a good talk about it. He recognises the double standard and admits there's a lack of care facilites for older children. Apparently the playclub opened its doors to over fives for extra evenings each week but few parents used the facility, so they reduced it to the one evening a week. It is not financially viable to offer care facilties for older chidren apparently. I find this strange because the creche itself is always heavily booked. Do parents of older children suddenly lose the desire to exercise?

I was also told that of course under 16 year olds were allowed in the cafe minus an adult, and leiure centre staff would turn a blind eye to my son if he was quietly reading in the cafe. It was my decision, they would accept no responsibility etc etc so strictly speaking this is not encouraged and I am left treading a grey area.

I have noticed that many other creches have either a 5 years or 8 years cut off point - ie shopping centre creches - and I think this is really not on. Why is it assumed that it is easy to take a 6 year old shopping? Why are there so few safe and supervised places for older children? they are surely just as much at risk of abduction?

I'd just like to ask you all if your local leisure centre provides supervision for older children. I'd like to go back to this manager and tell him how other leisure centres cope with this problem. Also, do private health clubs offer more in the way of care?