Something happened to DS whilst dropping off DD at school this morning....

[zephyrcat]

...and I'm not sure whether or not to let it go.

Every morning, DS, 4, plays in the corridor outside DD's class whilst I take her in and say goodbye. They have a big alphabet mat with letter tiles that he sits and puts on the mat.

This morning he came running into the classroom in a complete panic half crying half almost hyper ventilating but he won't tell me what happened which is very unusual for him. Whenever I asked him he kept saying "I don't know yet".

He went to nursery after that and his key worker got out of him that a lady told him off, and he will now say that to me but he won't tell me what was said.

I would usually let it drop but he was in such a state I want to know what was said! Do I keep trying to ask him later or am I going to have to let it go?

Your poor DS. I'd say you may have to let it go, he suddenly turn round and tell you at some point, but IME (DS2 is also 4) if he doesn't want to tell me something that's upset him he won't and I keep trying to get it out of him it just upsets him more.

Quite often he'll turn round and randomly tell me a few days/weeks later.

Poor lad. Agree with FAQ. If you chip away at him it might make the incident more significant. He'll probably just forget it.

leave it til bedtime.. that's when dd tells me stuff

god I've just re-read my post - surprised anyone can understand it

I guessed

lol makes perfect sense FAQ!

I know I should just leave it. I'm just so annoyed that someone has made him that upset, it's just not like him. Mind you, even if he did tell me what they said I wouldn't know who it was. Gits.

Probably a teacher/assistant said something to him? I had something similar happen yesterday - had a parents meeting after school. As I was the only one with a pre-schooler I sent ds2 into the Reception playground with ds1 so he would be occupied but I could still see him. All the other kids were in the main playground or had gone to the park nearby. The ds's came in looking a bit sheepish - had been told by the Reception assistant to get out of the playground.....

Poor little thing.

If this were me and my ds reacted in such an unusual way I think I would try and find out what he had supposedly done by asking the teacher who was around at the time.

agree he may well come out with it spontaneously if you don't push it. Poor little sausage, sounds as if someone was a bit harsh. Perhaps a teacher or TA with little experience of 4yos?

One thing you might try is acting the situation out with toys while playing later... so Bear and Rabbit can sit and play with letters (if you've got any letters) then you can try "Here comes Mrs Hippo... she looks a bit cross" and see where that takes you.

bath times usually the time when dd tells me stuff. one day he'll just spurt it out and you'll wonder "what the h*ll is he talking about??"