Following on from JoshandJamie's discipline thread (didn't want to hijack) - I need some advice please

[citronella]

I recently move house and happily for my dss (2&6)they palled up over the garden fence with the two little boys(5&9) next door. A few days ago I agreed for the 2 next door to play in our garden for a bit and my 2 went round to their garden a few days later. So far so good. But now it seems that the 2 next door wait for us to come home by sitting on the fence (I don't allow mine to climb the fence), looking through our kitchen windows (no curtains/blinds)and calling for dss/their ball(which they have kicked over several times)and basically almost watching our every move. The other night I felt I couldn't have a bit of privacy in the kitchen without being watched. I don't really want to put blinds up because I like to see straight into the garden. It's irritating me but I was thinking I could just about put up with it because ds1 had taken to them and they all seemed to play so nicely. BUT last night I heard one of the kids (the 9yr old I presume) through the wall shouting at the top of his voice "You fing wer!!" Now, I am not pretending to be a perfect parent but

1. I would not allow my kids to make a nuisance of themselves to others (they were sitting on the fence 'til 10pm the other night).
2. I definitely don't want my 6 year or 2 year old for that matter hearing and repeating that kind of language. I'm sure they will at some point but I think 9 is too young too.

So, I could limit their contact which is a bit difficult because they can see each other over the fence or say something but that would make me seem like I'm stuck up or something.

So my question is how would you feel and what would you do?

If i heard the swearing again, I would say to the child 'please don't say words like that when my children could hear you'

Whats wrong with shoo-ing them home if they are bothering you? I couldn't bear to have two little oiks peering at me all the time.

Don't worry about seeming stuck up...do whats right for you and your boys.

Wow, tough.
Take your children to a park to play .Could you put up a higher fence? Voils in the window? Little curtains that can be pulled back?
You can't change other people's children so you have to make sure yours know that it's naughty to swear.
Move house!!!

Fortunately mine didn't hear the swearing they were fast asleep in bed and they don't know I heard (it was through the wall). I was just shocked at what I heard coming out of the boy's mouth and thought he may use that language in front of mine.
Other than that they do seem quite sweet and the eldest swept the garden path up when they had all chucked earth about and I know they just want to play.

Sounds like you need to just chll out a bit about the situation, as there is not much you can do about it.

If they're peering into your windows, just pop your head out and kindly but firmly say you don'r want them doing that or something.

Yes I think you're right won't worry until/if the swearing happens in front of ds. Roman voile blinds sound lovely.