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Parenting

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2.5 Year Old Delayed.... possible Autism?

8 replies

AMBTS181403 · 25/08/2026 07:28

I am looking for some experiences as I am worried my eldest has speech delay/ development delay/possibly autism?

My eldest is 2.5 years old and there are a few things that concern me about his development....

He only said about 20 words at 2 years old, now 2.5 has made big improvements and can copy 80/90% of what we say, he knows numbers, colours, shapes, animals etc etc- however use of functional language to request is limited. Wouldn't ask for a snack for example, but would say open please, out please, ready set go, outside all relatively in the correct manner. He has probably upwards of 200 words minimum but doesn't answer questions yes/no either.
His speech has vastly improved in the last 6 months, he starts speech therapy this week... so I am hoping that will help.

Playing is where I have concerns, since finishing nursery for the summer he has started aimlessly walking around - wandering around like a circuit almost and putting objects in the circuit. Has always struggled a little with attention to play - however recently seems more noticeable. Doesn't alway play with toys typically- however will pretend talk on the phone, put teddy bear to bed, do jigsaws, build towers, go down the slide etc a little when at home. When we are out he has started to just wander round like he is assessing the area almost. He likes other children but not for or against playing with them, usually quite happy doing his own thing.

He eats relatively well - any curry, any pasta based dish, sausages (sometimes), chicken, lamb all fine, cheese, yoghurt, pork pie, bananas, apples. However can be fussy on trying something new.

He sleeps through the night 10/11 hours plus a nap in the day.

He has no other noticeable sensory issues - no sensitivity to noise, busy places, bright lights, doesn't tip toe walk. Not fussy on textures usually.

Had just started to scream when we say no... lasts a minute or two then moves on, sometimes a tantrum but nothing major.
He has good eye contact and talks in his own language still. Looks at you when he talks.

He doesn't stim - nothing we or nursery have noticed anyway.
He goes to nursery 2 mornings a week and he loves it.

His understanding isn't great I wouldn't say, does understand things like sit on the step, put shoes on, get in your chair, to the car, upstairs, bathtime, bedtime, dinnertime, hold mummy's hand for example but not go and get your shoes, can you find .... , can you get me....
And he doesn't always respond to his name (alone) but does usually if I say, can you come this way please etc etc.

In my head I am so worried about what life is going to look like for him, where do I focus my time in helping him?

How do I help him understand more things?

Are things going to get harder or easier for him? I guess thats a difficult question to ask.

I just want to help him as much as I can - he is such a happy little boy.

OP posts:
Midnightmoonface · 25/08/2026 07:39

I really don’t understand what behaviour you think are symptoms of autism?

As for worrying about his life because he has been a bit slower at communication at 2 years old, you’re really getting ahead of yourself. You know he’s improved so much in 6 months, there’s no reason that would stop and he wouldn’t progress further in the coming months!
If he only understands basic short version of commands then use them but use them in conjunction with the normal adult phrasing so that he has exposure to it and can pick it up. Don’t be tempted to dumb down language constantly.
There’s a huge range of normal with 2 year olds, it’s why Have generally aim for the 2 year review at 2y4m and look for 50 words, it allows many of the children to catch up by that point. Your DC is only a little past that and sounds like he’s improved so much, the speech and language intervention will only help.

AMBTS181403 · 25/08/2026 07:56

@Midnightmoonface I think because of how he learns language I wasn't sure and a health professional mentioned in when he was 2 because he had no attention and his play was a little different i guess?. Its been driving me mad ever since. He does his own thing at nursery too.

Thank you for commenting its so refreshing to hear someone who has a neutral view say basically what am I worried about.

He has made great progress in the last 6 months xx

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 25/08/2026 07:59

He sounds absolutely delightful! You’re worrying unnecessarily here - everything you’ve described fits in with the developmental stages of a toddler.

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waryandbored · 25/08/2026 08:09

I wouldn’t be overly concerned about the things you describe but my thoughts are that I would always rather overreact than under react when it comes to my kids. I would speak to nursery when he goes back as they will have seen all kinds of delays and additional needs and can observe him, then support you if needed. It sounds like he’s made great progress in the last few months so chances are he’s just progressing at his own pace as so many of them do!

Grumpyeeyore · 25/08/2026 08:22

Is there back and forth communication - which doesn’t have to be language it could be singing a song with him facing you and him enjoying the back and forth of the social connection. Doe he seek you out to share things with you eg point at a aeroplane.

Many children with language difficulties can look autistic at age 2 but their difficulties don’t extend beyond language. There are loads of free speech therapy activities on Pinterest or Twinkle as well as visual timetables etc which can help with the understanding (and using visuals won’t stop speech it will help it). You could look at Hanen resources / books which have lots of ideas for promoting speech and comprehension.

AMBTS181403 · 25/08/2026 08:58

@Grumpyeeyore he rarely points maybe once a week might point to something does sometimes point in books when counting. Sings songs all day long and often looks at us when trying to communicate ( and we dont understand what hes saying), does wave, Hi 5/10 just very rarely points at things of interest.

OP posts:
Grumpyeeyore · 25/08/2026 12:40

A lot of that sounds positive. DS is autistic and regressed between 2-3 and language stalled / went backwards. Obviously see what the speech therapist says but you can’t do any harm by working on speech and play skills at worst you will give extra help that wasn’t needed. It could be a language delay or disorder or it could be verbal dyspraxia if you can’t understand him - can he use a straw / blow a kiss - so using his mouth muscles properly? Sometimes young children seem to regress or stall in one area when they are making progress in another. The main difference with autism is they aren’t that interested in people and prefer things or patterns. DS started to look through us and lost interest in interacting. It was the lack of social interest not just language issues that were a red flag. Another child in our extended family was also assessed but they were just delayed with language and play skills and caught up.

hahabahbag · 25/08/2026 12:47

He seems advanced to me. Not every kid is speaking full sentences at 2, my dd2 was like your son or slower actually at speaking yet no issues. I’d let him be a kid and speak to nursery early next year if he is not fully fluent in speech

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