How much rent is fair to charge an adult child living at home

[MirloBlanco]

Hi,
my 39 year old child has been living at home now for two years totally funded by ourselves. He has finally got a job and I need to know what is a fair amount to charge him? We have funded a masters, paid some legal bills and he uses my car to commute for work and to go to the gym. We cover all bills , have supplied a lap top, mobile, clothes , haircuts etc . He messed up his life but we are in our 60’s and had hoped to be planning a retirement , without funding an adult child.

At least £400 a month and then he does a big food shop once a month from a list provided by you

At least £800.00 or preferably he finds his own place.He is a middle aged man FFS unless there is some huge backstory.

We charged 20% of their take home, half of that we put away in an account to save so they had a nice amount to buy furniture etc when they moved out, which was a nice surprise for them we doubled it as a gift too.

we were in the lucky position that we didn’t need the money so could do that for them.

for the 20% they had to clean their own rooms and bathroom including change the bed. I did all cooking cleaning and laundry though they did all help which I think is nice because they did it because they wanted to. I provided 3 meals a day including lunch ( which they made themselves) a odd bottle of wine / beer and basic toiletries- if they wanted posh stuff they bought it.

Does he have any other outgoings such as child maintenance?

As a starting point, he should be paying all his personal expenses - clothes, phone, gym etc

Then tot up
half the cost of the car - insurance, tax petrol
one third of council tax and utilities
plus contribution to food shop
and see what that comes to relative to his income, and use that as a starting point.

A rule of thumb is that housing is 20-30% of your budget. So that is what I would charge him. If that is more than what it costs for you to have him in your home, you can save the excess.

Bet my life savings that was not for a 39-year-old man

After reading this thread so far I'm moving back home!

My DC is 25 and at uni, funds his own car, insurance, fuel. Tax etc We pay out for any unexpected costs for the car. He houses himself and buys all his own food and has no job. This is purely out of his student loan stuff. He also manages cheap breaks away with that (think Easyjet £15 flights and budget accommodation). We do pay his phone and he has a credit card in my name for emergencies and unexpected costs (recently used it for several prescription charges when ill), that kind of thing.

I occasionally send him the odd £30 - £100 when he isn't expecting it as I know he'll put it to good use.

I obv don't know the back story but you two are saints OP!

£500 and he pays all his expenses himself. Or go somethere else.

I would be strongly encouraging him to move out tbh.

Rent needs to cover at least half of bills, food, car costs etc so around £800 - £900 a month.

Thank you for all your advice. We had also funded his time at uni for 6 years, including rent and phone and a car. He has since also crashed my car, despite us giving him the opportunity for lessons etc. yes there is a back story but he is in this position of his own making, but we are paying for it.
I will take on board everything that has been said and mull it over.

It sounds like living with him is making you unhappy, OP.
So this isn't about his rent.
Give him 6 months to move out somewhere, then you can plan your life with more space (without him having to be in it).
It could be that if you sharply raise the rent (£800/month, whatever) that will motivate him to move, anyway.

If you didn't mind living with him, and if you don't need the money, then the amount could be anything that you wanted. My adult son pays £40/week to his dad as keep, but they get along well so suits them.