Preparing a 12-year-old for a combined ADHD and autism assessment

[Wingingitt]

Looking for advice from parents who have been through a combined ADHD/autism assessment with an older child.

My daughter is 12 and has her combined ADHD/autism assessment coming up. I’m wondering how best to prepare her beforehand and whether anyone has any advice on making the process feel less daunting.

I’m also unsure about the feedback appointment if she receives a diagnosis. Did your child come into the appointment and hear the outcome directly, or did you hear it first and then tell them afterwards? Looking back, which approach do you think worked best and why?

If you told your child afterwards, how did you explain it? If they were in the appointment, how did they react?

I’d also really appreciate any advice on helping a 12-year-old understand ADHD and/or autism in a positive, reassuring way, especially if they haven’t really considered it before.

Any experiences, tips or things you wish you’d known beforehand would be hugely appreciated.

Thank you. ❤️

How did you broach the subject of her needing an assessment @Wingingitt?

She’s been struggling at school a while and I a receded timetable due to anxiety and overwhelm so I’ve told her the assessment will help us to find any underlying issues
so we know how best to support her x

She’s also requested herself a few times that she wants to be assessed for adhd x

I just explained to my DC that they would be left in a room with 2 doctors who would ask them questions to help them decide on the right diagnosis. I'd had a chat with the consultant beforehand who'd briefed me on what to expect.

I was then called in to be given the diagnosis (DC wasn't in the room) and we decided it was best if I told them. DC was so concerned about NOT getting a diagnosis it was a relief for them to have it confirmed.

There are lots of books available, I would look at reviews for the most age appropriate ones. My DC liked "All Cats have Autism" but that might be a bit young (there's an ADHD version too).

Can you contact the clinic directly about the feedback appt? Different places may approach this differently.

I think it’s all about reassuring her that this isn’t something that she can pass or fail, it’s just to better understand how she learns, how she understands things, how she feels about things so that they can make recommendations about how the people around her could make things better and what she could add or take away from her routine to make things easier for herself. She should just be herself, answer honestly and tell them what she needs.

Easy breezy is how we are handling it

we didn't use the autism word for a few years as she had very negative connotation's of it but now we just ask her how she will feel with that label

hiw will you feel if you are also labeled ? Your anxiety seems v high so you may need to work on that

the expert should be able to put you at ease