I don’t speak to my sister anymore for various reasons and haven’t in years, but one thing that used to cause arguments between us was babysitting her son. I did have him quite a lot, but if I ever said no it seemed to be a problem.
At the time I was a young single mum with two children under 2, so life was pretty full on. One evening my sister invited me out for dinner with her and one of her friends. While we were there she asked if I could have her son that night so she could go out with her friend afterwards.
I said no because I was exhausted my kids didn’t see their father and I was raising them on my own. I’d also taken him to the zoo with my own two children a couple of days before, so I just wanted a quiet weekend. I didn’t mention the zoo or anything, I just said I was tired and couldn’t do it.
She then started laying into me in front of her friend, saying the only reason I wouldn’t have him was because I was jealous of her. Apparently I was jealous because I had “no life” and couldn’t go out myself, so I didn’t want her going out either. I remember just sitting there thinking, where on earth has this come from?
Looking back, I honestly think the whole reason she’d invited me out was to ask me to babysit.
What I’m wondering is whether people really do get angry when family members won’t watch their children? I’ve always seen babysitting as a favour, not something you’re entitled to. Especially as she never had my children herself.
Would you have been annoyed if a sibling said no, or does this seem as odd as it does to me?