Tips for managing bedtime alone with a toddler and 5 month old

[Confusedmommadrama]

I currently have a 2 year old and a 5 month old. Feel like we are nailing pretty much everything, except for a bedtime routine that one of us (myself or DH) could do on our own.
we currently bathe them both each night together, as they both sleep much better after one and DH gets to spend that time with them as he starts work very early (out the house by 6am). Currently we then divide and conquer, I sort the 5 month old and husband does toddlers bedtime. 5 month old won’t take a bottle so I’m currently only breastfeeding, however she’s pretty easy to get to sleep by rocking etc.
Where this comes unstuck is when one of us tries to do bedtime on our own. Can’t seem to work out best way to do it! 5 month old won’t fall asleep whilst toddler awake, as she gets too distracted, toddler won’t go to sleep if baby awake as she gets what seems to be FOMO, plus can’t put the toddler into her room and leave baby in babies bed, as baby will start screaming. End up either lying on toddlers floor trying to breastfeed baby and keep quiet, or end up trying to keep toddler quiet while getting baby to sleep, which toddler gets annoyed at. Any tips welcome!

Put big kid in bed with audiobook until baby asleep then go to do big kids cuddles story light out

Have then both in your bed till they’re asleep then move them

Tried this with her Tonie box on but she absolutely lost her shit the moment I left the room. It’s annoying as she’s a fantastic little sleeper and goes to bed really well when we are doing it with both of us

I used to feed the baby in the toddlers room and sit there until toddler fell asleep then moved the baby to their cot.

Am I right in thinking you normally lie on floor with toddler while she falls asleep? But you're not comfy doing that with baby? If you had a chair would that help?

Had you spoken to her in advance that things might be different at bed and why? Sometimes helped with mine to treat it like a little team adventure 'dad is out/mum is working so we are going to be a team tonight and go to bed together, heres how...I'm going to sit on a chair a little bit away from you but you can still see me' or whatever

Not guaranteed but might help?

Also, they do change fast at that age (both of them) so you my find things just click a little better if you try again in a few weeks

Reward chart for sleeping like a big girl for mummy and daddy, and talk to her about it in advance if you know you’re doing it alone. Not sure if that’ll help but anything is worth a shot! Good luck. We have a 6 week old and two 5 year olds, it’s not easy so I feel for you.

Can they share a room? I had a similar age gap with mine and it worked best although youngest was in our room until a few months older now I think about it 🤔
I think like another poster said, can you nurse baby on a chair in toddlers room while she falls asleep then take baby into cot?

I always feed baby while doing toddler's bedtime story, put baby in sling. Stand/sway in the dark and sing lullabies to both. Then transfer baby to cot/feed again if needed once toddler is asleep.

Yes, this is exactly what I used to do. Baby would often fall asleep and then we’d kinda have to start bedtime again once older one was asleep or I could ease him down into bed (we coslept) still feeding.

I’d breastfeed baby in toddlers room until toddler asleep, or have baby in a carrier. Then put baby down afterwards. Baby will need later bedtime anyway surely as having naps.