Friends - Girls - bitchy comments - normal? - year 7

[Motherhood2025]

Secondary School. Should I encourage my daughter to just ignore bitchy comments from girls she used to be in primary school with?? She went up (much to my dismay) with two girls who she used to be in a trio with only for them to dump her and they were put in same tutor. Daughter has settled brilliantly and they went off together and daughter has made lots of new friends. Recently after almost the whole of year 7 being absolutely fine they’ve been saying bitchy things about her appearance and says she is copying them (in a school where they all look exactly the same and do same hair/lashes/nails etc!!) in the last week - she tells me feels a bit rubbish then moves on whereas I’m stuck feeling rubbish! Is this normal shall I continie to encourage her to ignore them and take no notice - says more about them than you etc or should I notify school? Doesn’t help we live on same road. Just want to know I’m not crazy.

What does your daughter want you to do?

Yes, just ignore, but validate for her that it’s not kind behaviour and that she should focus on the friendships where she is treated with kindness and respect.

Friendships completely change in Y7. My dd is really only still friends with one friend from primary school. Not because there was any falling out. They simply went their separate ways. Some of them are now drinking and vaping in the park 😳 and that is not anything she wants to be around. Some of them found their geeky art friends and mostly just game now. She hangs out with her sporty friends and goes to sports practice.

It all settles down a bit in Y8 so just focus on the nice friendships and foster them a bit over the summer.

Ignore it OP, girls can be complete bitches. You could say something and then next week it could all be blown over. Just keep reminding your daughter that it is not nice and encourage her to spend time with her new friends.