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Parenting

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Bitting

2 replies

LessFunMoreMum · 07/06/2026 13:50

Hi all,

Desperately looking for some advice. I am a single mum to three beautiful children aged 10, 5 and 3. Since starting nursery, my sensitive gentle little baby has turned into a human version of Jaws with the added hair pulling and pinching and smacking and his faviourte phase is 'silence you' whenever you dare tell him no (I'm not sure where this has come from)
My oldest two had their tantrums and meltdowns but they were never biters or hair pullers. When he bites (and his victims are anyone in his sightline) he will latch on to you like a hamster. My hand is covered in bruisers from him and I have bald spots from where he has ripped my hair from my scalp. My 5 and 3 year old physically fight from the moment their eyes oprn until bedtime. If you tell my 3 year old to say sorry he'll say 'no'. He'll pull my 10 year olds hair and laugh if she cries. The most challenging thing is this behaviour doesn't just occur when he's been told no. Sometimes he'll be sat on the sofa having a cuddle and he'll randomly take a chunk out of your hand. Or smack you. Theres no warning.
He's only 3 and I know alot of it is testing boundaries but I don't want him growing up thinking this behaviour is acceptable. I've tried redirection, 'kind hands', books on biting, moving myself (others) away from hin when he's in this mood, even trying to put a word to his feelings but nothing seems to work.
It sounds so pathetic to admit but its really having an impact on me because this behaviour is so left field. I feel like I'm being bullied by a 3 year old and thats pathetic.Their father and I have very different parenting approach, he's very strict and authorative and I try to do the gentle parrenting approach. He bit my 10 year old so hard it drew blood and I did shout and he just laughed. His dad thinks he has no respect for me.
Is the 'thinking step' still a thing or is that outdated? Any advice welcomed

OP posts:
hellospring26 · 07/06/2026 14:04

He doesn’t need gentle parenting!

whippersnapper55 · 07/06/2026 23:17

I wouldn't be gentle parenting this behaviour. I'm not one for shouting but a very loud NO in a very angry voice might just shock him. I think you need to show him consistently that the behaviour is unacceptable - remove him to his room and tell him he can't be around other people if he hurts them, and ignore him and make a big fuss of the child that's hurt.

Have you asked at Nursery if this could be learned behaviour from another child?

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