Nearly four-year-old becoming increasingly picky with food, any advice?

[BioMommy]

My DD is turning 4 very soon and her eating and diet are not great and just getting worse. It seems like everyday there is something new she won’t eat. I’m down to about 4 evening meals she will eat, but even then she will sometimes chew some of the food and spit it out (on a tissue, not in a rude way).
I’ve tried not to make a big deal about it, and I’ve tried the whole ‘add a new food with their safe foods at meal times’ but she will just take one look at it, say she doesn’t want it and takes it off her plate.
I just don’t know what to do. She would happily eat snacks, crisps, grapes or a McD happy meal all day every day (which obviously I don’t do) but it’s really worrying me. I don’t know where it’s come from, I think it has just gradually crept in to be honest.
I’m especially worried as she starts school in September and is doing brilliantly well in all other areas, except food. I really want her to have school dinners but I just don’t know what to do.
I guess I’m looking for advice on how to get her or eat a wider, more varied diet. xxx

We had a similar experience with DS who is almost 6 now. What’s made a really positive difference is him having school dinners every day. He’s tried lots of new things as there’s an element of positive peer pressure and the opportunity to try things in an environment other than at home.

That’s made me feel so much better. I really want her to do school dinners so I’m hoping it has the same effect 🤞🤞🤞
thank you so much for relying x

Keep offering a variety of foods at every meal. Don't want to eat it? That's fine, no big deal, you leave it on the side of your plate. And repeat. The key is, it's no big deal. DS went through all sorts of "I don't like" stages. He's 18 now. He'll eat pretty much everything with a handful of things he still doesn't like as an adult.

It's so tough, I completely sympathise!

It's difficult because what worked (or I guess works, as in she's 6 so it's still ongoing) for our DD is being really strict on the whole "this is all there is to eat" approach, but I know that doesn't work for everyone. Oddly what doesn't work so well is getting her to choose some veg that she will eat in advance - tonight in the supermarket she would only choose carrots and was adamant she doesn't like green beans or broccoli, but she still ate some of them when dinner time came around. We do acknowledge that she really doesn't like some things, like spinach, but we are clear we won't stop putting it in our food because we really like it and it's good for us. She can pick it out if she wants. I think letting her see that we do accept that she has her own likes and dislikes helps overall. We do also say that she doesn't have to love everything she eats - sometimes if we know something is good for us then it's worth eating just to make sure we get the benefit from it.

I think it comes down to whether you think your child is just trying out being fussy or is really struggling to eat certain things. With DD we're fairly confident it's a phase and she's sort of enjoying "not liking" things. She's been known to claim to really hate carrots literally while polishing off the carrots on her plate, with no intervention from us!

We also give her a vitamin pill every evening, which I think make us feel a bit more relaxed when she's having an off week and it feels like she hasn't wanted to eat anything of nutritional value!