Clubs for an anxious but energetic 5 year old boy

[ArizonaOne]

DS is quite an anxious 5 year old, doesnt do well with change and gets quite scared going to new things/places/meeting people hut usually LOVES it once having done it.

Used to do swimming, gave that uo due to having to move up a class and hated it. Tried football, didnt like it as was too chaotic. Has anyone got a similar child who can recommend a different sort of club he may enjoy? He has SO much energy at home that we feel he would benefit from having some sort of hobby once he got used to being there.

Beavers (or might be Squirrels at that age). Great for developing confidence and new skills and leaders will be well used to anxious kids starting.

I am a Girlguiding leader and have seen many anxious girls come through and leave transformed.

Agree with Beavers but get him on a waiting list now. Ours is about two years long (although for an adult permanent volunteer we’d take the child immediately).

Agree with the beavers. Also try to get to the bottom of what is bothering him about soccer. Cricket is less push and shove? Would that suit him better. Also tennis.

I’d try and get him back into swimming if he liked it. Moving up a level can be daunting but it’s possible to push through and overcome it even if it means going back down to a lower class for a while. 5 is too young to give up swimming.

My ds was similar. Decided he wanted to try karate. We arrived at the first class, then he said "I'm not doing it unless you come too mummy" so I found myself in a class of mostly 5yos. 😁

He stuck at it because he liked the structure.
12 years later, he's a black belt and ignores me for being embarrassing. . I'm a brown belt and am so grateful that he did it. Despite being in my 60s I am more supple than I would have been otherwise.

Agree with the above but no way would I be allowing a 5 year old to decide he isn’t doing swimming. It’s a life skill!

Judo might be good. It’s very repetitive and structured and lots of giggles!

Cricket all stars is a good one and rugby tots. I would encourage him to stick out the swimming as well.

Thank you, yes ive had multiple conversations with him about why.. he just seems to be that type of child, he still barely talks to his teacher at school! Wont talk to most family due to shyness. I totally agree its very young to give up swimming but he had to move up a class without a parent in the pool and he wouldn't go in at all, we are trying to find somewhere that would be more understanding and find ways around this.

Thanks, I didnt realise there were long wait lists. I have looked at beavers and definitely would love him to join, however its the initial going somewhere that is with adults he doesnt know. Do they allow parents to attend for this first few sessions or anything?

Could you enrol him in the same swimming class as a friend? We did this and they gave each other confidence!

Thanks, I had looked at beavers briefly, do you happen to know if they allow parents to attend for a few sessions to help them get used to it?

That's amazing, well done! Thanks for you reply, im hoping he will eventually try something like this!

It's not really as simple as deciding he wont do swimming so we just stopped taking him. He would get so anxious to the point where he would be sobbing uncontrollably and we couldn't get him anywhere near the pool. The teachers couldn't do anything else to help at this particular place (they were so busy they never really had time to talk to anyone anyway) I completely agree about it being a much needed life skill, we are continuing to take him swimming ourselves until there is space at a 1-1 swimming class where they can give him more attention.

I just wanted suggestions for other clubs we could try.

Climbing. Climbing clubs often have very small group classes at that age. It’s structured, and with people, but not a team sport which is difficult for people who are anxious or shy around other people. It’s amazing for confidence and there is a lot of problem solving as well as the physical. Climbers tend to fall into the “quiet but friendly” type which is nice if you are a bit shy

Are there any dance schools in your area? My very anxious and low confident six year old boy has thrived since starting acro lessons at the dance school his sisters attend. He was nervous at the start but teachers were so kind and took their time with him, he now leaves each class with such a big smile on his face

It depends on the area. And their views on parents being there will also depend on the leadership team (although I know our group has done so, I can’t promise for your local one!).

Thank you for the suggestion, I will definitely look into this 😊

Yes there are quite a few I believe, he does love dancing at home so I could definitely look into this!

Have you spoken to the professionals involved in helping you help him with his anxiety, to see what they suggest?

I had tried by emailing his teacher, but because he seems ok in school (doesnt really talk to the teachers but has lots of friends and can get on with work tasks etc) they haven't suggested anything or offered much help unfortunately. Just said they would keep an eye on him.

I know he's ok in school but hes there 5 days a week so is comfortable now, school trips, the thought of going into year 1 he worries about it all.

Taekwondo worked wonders for my son at a slightly young let age. He did go with a friend initially who stopped going but it was also a class where parents stayed and watched. He had a really good teacher who encouraged him in small stages to get him more confident and he stuck with it for seven years eventually.

It gave him so much confidence, he realised he was actually good at a physical skill, having previously been Negative about his physical abilities, he made new friends and he could go at his own pace without competing against anyone.

I am a squirrels leader (4-6 year olds) beavers is 6-8. We have quite a few nervous children and some that need their parents to stay. We have 12-18 squirrels at a time so need 3-4 adults anyway so it helps us run the sessions too.
Our waiting list is currently 1 term so it does vary, we have recently opened a second beavers which has reduced the wait time for that as it was longer.

We are doing allstars cricket and we do football with my anxious 5 year old. I think these types of activities really are dependent on the people running it. The cricket is run by one of her friends dad's and there are 6-7 of her friends doing it which helps. Her football is just girls and that's a lovely small group the class is years 1-3 but they separate out year 1 and young year 2s which has made a real difference. I here the boys class is a bit more chaotic though.

Thank you, taekwondo sounds like something we could try!