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7 year old son behaviour please help

3 replies

CBC123 · 25/05/2026 20:52

everything is a battle

brushing teeth, getting dressed, eating, swimming lessons, football, going to school, going to bed. Unless it’s something he wants to do, it’s a nightmare. He just doesn’t listen. And then he can scream and have huge meltdowns. He is a good boy generally - not overly rude or aggressive, not full of energy all the time and can sit down to do Lego and homework and watch films etc. He is well liked, lots of friends. He’s doing fine at school. But when asked to do something he doesn’t want to….. it’s a nightmare. Is this normal for this age? We have a younger child who isn’t like this at all - it’s so hard to not compare. We’ve tried calm/options/reward charts we’re still working towards… my issue is - is this spoilt/normal behaviour where we need to be firmer and set stricter boundaries etc - or does this sound like there could be a condition where we actually need to be more understanding and try new ways? I’m feeling like a terrible parent as I get so frustrated…. But this is multiple times a day. It’s exhausting and affecting everyone… please help!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
lemoncurdcupcake · 25/05/2026 21:08

Is it a new situation? If so, have a look into adrenarche. It's a hormonal surge which can happen between 6 and 8 and causes a rise in mood swings, sass etc

This is also the stage known as the age of reason where they start to question loads and push boundaries. Super fun.

www.parents.com/kids/development/adrenarche-and-puberty-everything-you-need-to-know/

7 year old son behaviour please help
CBC123 · 25/05/2026 21:38

Thank you, I will take a look xx

OP posts:
lxn889121 · 26/05/2026 05:20

sounds like you have tried a lot of approaches already.

How does he get on with more authoritative styles? better or worse? I do think some children (often boys) just need a bit of toughness when it comes to things they don't want to do. They will push back on any sign of softness or weakness, and yet when they join a sports team with a tough coach, or cadets/military style stuff with no nonsense direct people in charge, all of a sudden they follow along and get in line.

It may not work at all, but it sounds like you have tried more "positive" approaches, so maybe give it a go. Just make sure you do it in a fair way, because boys who value very clear defined absolute rules, also tend to be hyper aware of fairness and the minute they see those rules being applied unfairly, is the minute the authority breaks down.

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