Right,goingto start potty training DD...

[wittyusername]

I'm going to slowly start potty training DD (15 months) next week...any books anyone can recommend? I haven't a clue about the process!

Oh and am glad for any tips and hints

15 months is very young! Any reason why you are starting now? Is she showing any particular signs of being ready? Can she communicate well with you (how is her speech/vocab)? How is she with undressing/how much help does she need? How is her movement (walking, beding down, etc.)

It is possible at this age but will vary a lot of factors as to how long it will take.

Buy a potty and/or toilet seat and pop her on it after meals, naps and whenever she pulls a poo face

We introduced a BSL sign for 'T' so my DD could tell us from a very young age when she wanted to go to the toilet.

Getting dressed is not necessary at this stage, my 22 month old DD has got everything else down except getting dressed/undressed, so I help her with that bit.

Good Luck

Agree 15 months is very young. Do you particularly like cleaning up bodily fluids or are you trying to persuade your DH that you need new carpets?

I say go for it you have nothing to lose, sitting your DD on the toilet or potty will mean you avoid staining your carpets

Hi all, thanks for replying.

I'm only considering this because I've been hearing from aunts and other family that I should start potty training DD... as she's my PFB I haven't a clue!

the baby whisperer recommends starting at this age, most other books advocate waiting until a lot later

I got a potty for ds when he was about 18 months and popped him on every now and again but kept him in nappies otherwise. sometimes he would do something and other times not. It was not stressful in any way though, he liked sitting there and having a book read to him.

I have just taken the nappy off two weeks ago - he is 2 yrs 8 months and we had about 50% hit rate at the start and up to 75% now, two weeks later.

I am not sure if introducing the potty early helped or not. I am pretty sure it does no harm though, as long as you dont get stressed about it. But in the end, he will not train until he is physically ready.

Ah yes, the family! My mum has been on about potty training Ds since he was 12 months old. Dontcha know we were all fully trained by the time we were 18 months?

I agree with justaphase, no harm in buying a potty and having a go at catching poos but until they are physically ready, there is nothing they or you can do about it.

No harm in trying but 15 months is YOUNG and I would imagine it will be more pot-luck than anything in the early days. Aunts are great at this, although I think they had different methods when we were young and a different motivation since there were no disposables ... my friend used to be sat on the potty after every meal from a really young age as her mum knew that was when she would go. She used to have a few issues with food when she was younger and am not sure it's not related. So I would say go for it but take your cues from your DD and not necessarily give in to family 'advice'!

DD1 was 25 months when she said she wanted to wear knickers and was pretty much there after a week (Gina Ford to the rescue).

DD1 is 22 months and will sometimes do a wee on the toilet before bath and this morning did one when she got up (her nappy was completely dry) so she's getting there. Just need to build up to actually trying her without a nappy (oh my lovely new oak floor ...).

I really don't think 15 months is young at all. I mean, sure, by the "traditional" (for this decade) keep-them-in-disposables-until-they-can-ask-in-full-sentences crowd it's young, but developmentally it's not early for some.

We started around 14 months with a toilet seat and, having done BLW, we're doing BLPT. We don't have the expectation that we'll be out of nappies any time soon, but because we're using a toilet and not a potty, every time he goes in the toilet is one less nappy and that's got to be good, right?

From about 13 months they start processing sequences and routines are suddenly comprehensible for them. Mimicking is another developmental leap around this time that helps if you let them see you use the toilet. Around this age, our DS started asking to feed the dog every morning. Well, I though, why can't he ask to go pee too? And he can! We started out with first thing in the morning. He used to fill two nappies on the trot; now he wakes up, has a lovely long cuddle and breastfeed, then runs off to the toilet and has a big wee, often having stayed dry since midnight and having nursed 2-4 times in between. After a few weeks he's also happy to poo on the toilet and has asked several times to go make a wee. He also responds to the question "do you need to make a wee?"

Is he toilet trained? No. Can he hold it for very long? No. Does he always know before he goes? No, but sometimes he does.

As with all things parenting, the trick is consistency, realistic expectations, watching them like a hawk, a casual attitude to "accidents" and a little bit of sixth sense.

From what I've read, the muscles are fully mature between 18-24 months of age, so that's a good time for completion of toilet training, which means starting a bit younger. In terms of physical readiness, another sign is when they can jump -- get both feet off the ground on their own. IMO, readiness shouldn't be tied too closely to linguistic ability.

Ches's approach sounds just right to me. Keep it low-key, and don't expect to be done overnight.

I think the fact that your DS is dry from midnight sometimes is a major factor in your success Ches. My Ds is never dry for longer than 20 minutes at 21m.

Agree provincial lady. My DD is 22m and is sometimes dry after a full night, but not always, so I think she's nearly there.

I've never heard anyone link readiness to linguistic ability. DD1 was v.understandable but DD2 is not at all.

Not sure I really appreciate being judged as a member of the keep-them-in-disposables-until-they-can-ask-in-full-sentences crowd ches.

My view is to take your cues from your child. That doesn't mean when they actually tell you they're ready. DD1 did tell me she wanted to wear knickers. She was 25m, we went cold turkey and was 95% there in a week (if I'd waited till she could jump, she'd have been nearly 4). DD2 is barely understandable but she, at 22m, will sit on the toilet and sometimes so a wee/poo. Last night she sat for ages but then got in the bath and immediately did a wee.

I also think children get confused if they are in a kind of half way house where they use the toilet some time and where nappies the rest of the day. IME, the most successful was when the child wasn't in nappies at all during the day. If it didn't work and child was getting stressed, then stop and try again in a few weeks or so.

I think whatever method you use, you just need to be relaxed about it and not expect miracles. If they're older, it can be quicker, but not necessarily so. All children are different.

He wasn't dry from midnight until we started putting him on the toilet. It is now routine to pee on the toilet in the morning and he'll wait because he knows to expect it.

The disposables comment was regarding what's come to be "traditional" for this generation. When I was a baby we were out of nappies long before our second birthday. Call it the Huggies/Pampers marketing machine if you will. In my son's daycare, they call all nappies "Pampers."

Not trying to argue with what obviously works for you Ches, but I could put my DS on the toilet as many times as I liked and it wouldn't mature his system any quicker. You are suggesting that your son is waiting at night, whilst he is asleep, which can't possibly be a conscious decision for him.

Haven't actually got around to starting yet... still choosing potties

Thanks for the varied replies, they're all useful!

Babies stop weeing in their sleep pretty early on. They wake up slightly and wee and go back to sleep. I really don't care whether it's conscious or not, the fact is that if we hadn't started potty training we wouldn't even have noticed. He very quickly became aware when he was making a wee, which he wasn't before, and for the first week would say "uh-oh" every time he started to wee, be it on the toilet or in his nappy.

Without starting potty training you aren't giving your little one the opportunity to show whether or not their muscles are developed to be able to hold it in, because they've never had a reason to. Certainly there's no reason to wait with catching poo on the toilet as they're easily able to signal the need to go, voluntarily or not, and to wait a minute while you pop them on the toilet.

It is absolutely personal choice to decide to wait until your child is 2+ before starting and get it all done in 2 weeks. However, I think it's wrong to discourage other parents from taking an earlier, longer approach. It took us 8 months to wean and I don't mind if it takes that long to potty train too.

I can see how if you're using a potty instead of a toilet seat you wouldn't want to keep doing that for months on end. Frankly a potty disgusts my DH and I and we see it in the same way as we see pureed food - a pointless step that you just have to wean your lo off of again.

Choosing the toilet over the potty is a trade-off in independence. However, what we gain instead is loads of eye-to-eye play opportunities for 1-on-1 interaction. Our DS has learned a great deal during these potty sessions; including being able to point to several body parts, and loves to brush his teeth because we started with the toilet in the morning so we also did teeth and now he ASKS for his toothbrush every time he's on the loo.

Hi Witty - my DD is 15 months too and although I am keen to get her out of nappies (I use reusables and I'm bored of doing so much laundry) I do think she is a little young.

I reckon it is a summer job (less clothes to wash after accidents) so might give it a whirl in September if I think she is ready by then.

Don't feel pressurised by mothers or other relatives. My MIL always goes on about how her children were potty trained before 18 months. But I have read that if you try and force it before a child is ready it can take longer and be demoralising for them when they have accidents.

I've got as far as my DD going and sitting on the changing mat waiting for a fresh nappy when she's done a No2. Onen step at a time.

'force it before a child is ready it can take longer and be demoralising for them when they have accidents.'

1. Ches is talking about ECing (or a very close concept) and she specifically mentioned needing 'a casual attitude to "accidents"' No force at all.

1. Babies in nappies have accidents all the time. Which is why we put them in nappies to restrict the accident contents wee/poo to the baby's bottom and immediate area. If you honestly thought babies suffered from having accidents, you would be pottying your own child from birth

We introduced a potty/toilet seat at 10 months, but in a very laid-back way like ches suggested i.e. mostly when we would do a nappy change anyway. DD very quickly (within a couple of weeks) became poo aware, so we pretty much have not had to change a pooey nappy since then - she uses an adapted BSL sign to ask for the potty. 6 months on she is just mastering being pee aware, but often asks for the potty just as she is peeing - but it's all a step forward.

We have totally taken it at her pace with absolutely no forcing or coercion. I know it isn't potty training in the traditional sense, and I know that some people see it as the parents being trained rather than the babies. However we didn't see any harm in introducing the idea at an early age, and she has surprised us by how easily she took it on board.

For me the most telling thing was how quickly she stopped pooing in her nappies - I mean it must have felt uncomfortable to bother doing so, no? I'm so glad she didn't then have to go through that for another year (or more) before being given the opportunity.

Ches said "I think it's wrong to discourage other parents from taking an earlier, longer approach"

I've just re-read this thread and can't find anyone actively discouraging other parents. People (me included) have given our opinions but have all said give it a try as no harm done.

Surely this is what MN is about. Asking for opinions and then getting them.

This is an interesting thread. I've been wondering when to start training with my 10 mo DS. Have noted the Baby Whisperer "start early" approach directly contradicts the majority approach.

I have noticed that he is getting a lot drier at night. Not completely by any means but his nappies used to be soaking first thing and now they are only a little heavier than when put on. I was going to use a toilet seat thingy and start popping him on after meals which is when we tend to see some action.

Agree with the concept that the potty will be just another thing you have to transition from eventually.

I clicked on here looking for how to actully get started on the whole thing and whats a right way to go about it and i guess there are PLENTY of different takes.

I've just now went out and bought pull up cool alerts to get DD of 22 months onto the potty. She gets really bad nappy rash and it nearly brings me to tears when i have to wipe her sore bottom and put cream on.

I figure I'll go through this pack of 44 pull ups and see how they work. The plan after that is to go onto cotton knickers so that when adn if she does make an accident in her pants she'll know straight away and be uncomfortable enough to let me know that we do infact need the potty.
I'm determined to get her out of these nappies because 1) nappy rash is brutal and 2) we have a baby due in september
DD is GREAT for her age in my opinion with language so cross your fingers for me moms and i'll post our progress

I really don't think that what we're doing is ECing. In fact, this weekend, DS started saying "wee wee" when he has to use the toilet and as a result, today he wet only two nappies, both our fault. The first was because Dad was still in the shower when he woke from his nap and the second was because I forgot to ask if he had to go when we got back from the zoo.

Good luck Livysmum. Even if it takes her a while to crack it, I bet all that bare bum time on the toilet will help her nappy rash.

So on Saturday, DD2 (22 months) was without her nappy whilst playing in her room. She suddenly said "wee wee", stood up and there was a tiny bit of wee on the carpet, so we went to the loo and she finished it there. We kept her nappy off for the rest of the weekend (apart from naps and bed obviously) and no accidents at all.

She had an accident this morning - partly my fault. She had a very heavy nappy when she woke up and she said she didn't want to go to the loo (can't trust her on that one ... think she was just cosy in her nappy and pjs). So then she's sat having her breakfast and all of a sudden she tries to get down. I encourage her to stay (messing around at the table is a bit of a thing at the moment). 5 mins later she's done a wee.

She's now got 3 days at nursery so we'll see how she does. I'm amazed at how well she's doing. She doesn't like the potty which suits me just fine. I don't think she's really that keen on it all to be honest but is giving it a go! But every night she sits on the loo before bath, does nothing, gets in the bath and wees