How to wean 5am breastfeed without causing an earlier wake-up

[Mamabeartotwo]

My little guy is nearly 14 months, exclusively breastfed since birth. Eats 3 good solid meals a day and snacks. Recently takes 1 nap a day ranging from 1.5-2.5 hours. Usually sleeps 11.5-12 hours at night. Usually goes to bed between 8 and 8.30pm depending on how good his nap was. Was never a good sleeper, always a lot of night wakes but I night weaned at 11 months and it went well, he’s effectively slept through or thereabouts since then, however I never weaned the 5/6am feed as I was concerned he wouldn’t have the sleep pressure to go without this feed, I had hoped this would naturally phase out but 3 months in he still wakes for this feed usually some time between 5.30 and 6am, thankfully he goes back asleep after with no fuss and wakes for the day around 8am. Tbh this has been working for us but I really would love to stop breastfeeding soon and trying to figure out how to wean this feed without causing a 5.30/6am start to the day, it’s a tricky one. I would love to know if this feed is pure habit or if he’s truly hungry but at his age and weight I find it hard to believe that if he can make it to 6am he can stretch that bit and make it another hour or two?? Anyone have any experience of this?
ps: if I think about it he has always needed some level of comfort come this hour of the morning, as a newborn he would only sleep past 6am if in my arms, this gradually got better and as he got bigger we would co sleep til 6 months and then with sleep training at 6 months I could get him into his cot but he’s always had this feed.
He has slept through the full night on a handful of occasions but never consistently. I really thought dropping to one nap and longer wake windows would mean he would sleep through but alas, no dice. I honestly would be happy to keep going like this and I am so grateful for what he does do considering his sleep was so bad before but as I said I’m really getting close to the end of my bf journey. All experiences and advice welcome 🙏🏼

Obvious option would be cows milk in some sort of cup, or water and a cuddle. And send his other parent in to settle if possible...

I'm afraid this is why I am still breastfeeding a 2 year old and I breastfed my oldest until 3. He doesn't wake at 5 am every day, that stopped around 16/17 months, but he still ocasionally does, especially if he's ill or overtired, say 1 or 2, maybe 3, days a week. Breastfeeding puts him back to sleep very easily. Nothing else works, we tried. A friend of mine stopped BFing altogether because she wanted a break and her toddler wakes at 5am every morning still, with no way of putting him back down.

I also found as we got closer to 2, the tantrums and accidents were increasing, and BF helps A LOT. It calms him down, gives him a sort of zen moment after nursery for example, which really helps. When I try distracting him from the post nursery feed, his behaviour is worse. So there's a lot to be said about the emotional side.

As with everything small baby/child related, you kind of have to choose your hard. I totally get being touched out, if you are done, you are done, and you have done much more than the average woman already. But nothing is easy with small humans lol.

I think anyone who's never gone more than 9 hours without a feed is going to be somewhat hungry after 9 hours, it's just physiology. If I'm used to breakfast at 8am I feel hungry at 8am.

I think your best bet to force sleep between 5-7am would be to move bedtime later until you've dropped the feed then creep bedtime earlier again, but personally I wouldn't go messing and just live with it a bit longer or (more risky) try switching to another feed.

I'd cut that nap down so his sleep pressure is higher for the night, try capping at 1.5 hours. We cut my daughter's to 1 hour and she now sleeps through (19 months). It's very unusual to do 12 hours overnight plus a 2.5 hour nap! But you might just have to go cold turkey and offer cuddles / milk in a cup at that time, and be prepared for him to stay awake. It's fine if he does, 6am is a lie in for many toddlers.

I didn’t wean until 2 weeks ago and my little one is about to turn 3. The main reason is because I simply couldn’t find a possible way to wean him before he was able to understand. We sent his Milkies to the moon and he got chocolate as a gift in return (a big treat).

my friend weaned at 14 months, ended up with a lot of 5 am weetabix in bed for weeks. Eventually he just started waking up later.