To tell or not to tell....

[Salleroo]

No one told me about the after effects of childbirth:

Contant lingering discharge (2 months)
Flapping lips (Do they ever go back to normal?)
Night sweats
Hair loss
Blackheads on body (wtf??)
Potential infected stitches
Constipation (up to 6 mths post)
Spots all over body (due to constipation and poo trying to make a break for it through pores)
Mastitis (4 times)

I hated being pregnant but post birth is just horrific. No one told me about any of this and dont say they are in a beatific state of love with their baby and just didnt notice?

Is it that no one would give birth if they knew what comes after? Is there a secret code I'm breaking by telling? I can deal with anything if I'm prepared. And yes I did read the books but they damp it down somewhat.

Should I be keeping my gob shut?

I just kind of forgot what happened after! I guess I was so tired I didn't really register anything that happened. Don't remember getting most of the things on your list, actually. Hair loss was the super pregnancy hair, and that happened about 5 months after birth.

Think you've just been unlucky there. I would place more emphasis on the emotional problems that can occur post baby personally .

Never tell anyone who is already pregnant. They will find out for themselves. There is no benefit in knowing and most of them won't believe you anyway

Remember that time when you were preg with first and nothing existed beyond giving birth?

It is a conspiracy.

I dont think you should keep quiet but at the same time I didnt really suffer like you seem to have
Yes I lost my hair but that was the extra hair I gained during pregnancy ans I got a bit more spotty mainly due to tiredness.

Have you seen any one about the infection?

I think you've been exceptionally unlucky, but I do remember the night sweats freaking me out. Agree, no one will believe you if you tell 'em anyway

Ooh yes sorry; did get night sweats, they were grim!

I tell people, as agree that it's better if you know what to expect. Wasn't that bad - but I had attacks of the shakes that were quite scarey for a couple of weeks. I would have preferred if someone had told me I might have them and that it was not late-onset epilepsy or something.

lol sparkleysparkles re late-onset epilepsy.

Bronze, infection long gone, antibiotics cleared that little issue up.

Guess I must have been pretty unlucky , but at least they were physical rather then emotional.

On the plus side, I was thinner then before I got pregnant 3 weeks after birth

The hair falling out surprised me. Mine came out in handfuls - no one warned me about that.

For me the emotional side of things was worse. I had PND after DS and really struggled. I didnt start to feel normal again till he was nearly two.

The physical things I remember were: hair loss, sweating, general aches, but nothing that major.

However, I was pretty much insane with sleep deprivation for at least the first six months postnatal, extremely emotional and weepy, combined with manic periods of where I would be out of the house all day as I was so lonely at home.

I really hope it won't be like that this time (DC2 due in December)

know what you mean about the constipation - like a contraction .

But even worse is what comes afterwards.

Without going into TMI, had to call Dyno Rod out in the middle of the night 2 days after DS was born due to a blockage in the plumbing . I was so horrified.

Message withdrawn

No, I think it's right to tell. I don't think it's a conspiracy of silence that most people don't though. I think you just forget.

ha ha ilovemydog, you've just reminded me, I had to unblock the toilet myself one morning with a coat hanger. Jaysus, it gets worse and worse

Alfreda, I dont think you ever forget. It's worth it now that dd is a gorgeous, funny little 7 month old but I did wonder what had posessed me to have a baby for those first 3 months of no sleep, constant feeding followed by vomiting and having no idea what to do as well as my varied selection of post natal delights!

Pruners, the heightened hearing is a good one, but that's a bonus. I tell myself I've developed a bionic ear

Yes! I got the night sweats, hair loss and constipation, potential infection and flapping lips. To explain further, night sweats in early days, hair loss once I stopped bf (at 5 mo). Soreness and major disomfort going to the toilet at 6 weeks which I explained to mw and consultant but was told probably just an undissolved stitch, which it was in the end. I then had constipation quite a lot which I combatted by eating a cereal like bran flakes every morning for a few months plus drinking lots of water, in the early stages I took some lactulose too as pooing very painfull!!! And not forgettin the flapping lips, for the first month or so my fanjo felt like it was sucking in bubbles of air and blowing them out again WTF??!!! It is the dicomfort I felt after ds was born that makes me think again about having another one, infact the pain pooing (which I wasn't sure was piles or a problem with stitches) actually felt to me more painfull than the labour itself!

ooh my piles, its like sh*tting glass still 5 months post birth. also losing hair, pulling bundles from the plughole after every bath. constantly hot at all times causing night sweats, mastitis, an infection in my stitches resulting in scar tissue and having to be restitched under GA. fanny farts a-go-go. i loved being preg and loved giving birth, expected to be having another one pretty soon but the long list of post natal probs means we havent even had sex yet and the longer they drag on the more i think i cant face it again.