Weaning breastfeeding toddler

[Blueturtle12]

Hey,

Seeking some positive stories and tips for night weaning a breastfeeding and co-sleeping 18mo.

Daytime - trying to reduce feeds to a morning and night feed which is easier on childminder days.

Overnight - DS sleeps on floor bed in his own room. I feed to sleep and feed back to sleep on each wake up. He wakes up multiple times until I eventually get in bed with him around 11pm. E.g he goes to sleep at 7pm, wakes up and cries for me every half an hour/hour until I eventually cave and get in bed with him. He sleeps a longer stretch when I’m next to him, so I think my presence is a huge sleep association for him. He then latches throughout the night but I’m so delirious that I hardly notice, he probably feeds twice more until wake up at 7am.

I went through a period of trying to rock/pat him to sleep for naps and tried this going to sleep at night a couple of times. There were lots of tears. I’ve recently returned to work so have reverted back to what is easiest and means we all get more sleep.

DS doesn’t respond to Dad settling for sleep. On the odd occasion I go out during nap tIme or bedtime sleep, it’s chaos and DS cries a lot. I have settled for every single sleep and wake since he’s been born.

I think it would benefit all of us if he slept longer stretches throughout the night. Trying not to feel guilty for the habits I’ve created and trying to be proud of myself for parenting, with no break or family help.

So please share any tips on night weaning and what worked for you. Keen to hear how people weaned gently.

Ime, there isn't really a super gentle way of weaning, unless they choose to self-wean. They're going to be upset whatever you do so I got my DH to do it. Yes, they'll be upset for a couple of days, but it will work. You just have to power through.

My DH just took her up to bed one night (we also have a floorbed) and she cried for about 30 minutes. Next night, 10 minutes of crying, and now she's happy going to bed and being cuddled to sleep by either of us. It is hard, but you just have to remember that it's okay for them to cry, they are safe and with a loving parent.

The freedom of not being responsible for putting them down for every nap and bedtime, and attending every night wake is incredible. She also started sleeping through very shortly after this transition!

I haven't any tips, as I am continuing to breastfeed my 2.5 year old on demand (when I'm not at work), with no plans to stop.

But I do follow Emma Pickett on Instagram and she is an IBCLC, specialising in extended breastfeeding and weaning. She has loads of useful tips.

https://www.instagram.com/emmapickettibclc?igsh=bnNwdjJ5b3BrMGxr

I’d first look at his schedule and sleep pressure at bedtime, it sounds like he isnt tired enough. How long does he nap for? I’d say 7pm bedtime is too early whilst still napping. Capping nap at 1 hour and bedtime 7.30-8 has really helped mine sleep better. I sent my husband in if it was before 3am, and then after that I’d join her for a feed and cosleep. After a few weeks she stopped waking until 4/5am, I think she got the message there was no milk. Of course there were tears but he cuddled/sang to her, I think you have ti expect tears but it’s fine if you are comforting.

I went out three evenings in a row and left exDP to put DC2 to bed. It worked like a dream but DC2 was 4!