I am really struggling with my 6 month old at the moment and don’t know what to do. I am looking for some advice if possible or even just some consolation that this will get better as right now I feel hopeless.
For some context I will try and give a bit of background information:
- Daughter cried non stop from 3 weeks - 4 months old and never napped during this time
- At 4 months she was much happier and felt like a different baby
- She did sleep well at night for the first 3/4 months but since then has slept badly at night
- At 5 months she became frustrated and was crying a lot again - trying to learn to crawl and other skills
- She crawled at 5.5 months which I thought would help her mood but it hasn’t
- She can sit independently and can sit up by herself from the floor
She is now 6 months old and is more upset than ever. She genuinely spends about 60-70% of the day crying. She doesn’t cry when she is eating (we have been weaning for a few weeks and she loves this) and she can be soothed / calmed by music if she is upset.
All of the things I thought would help improve her mood don’t seem to have done anything. She enjoys food but as soon as she’s out of the highchair she is back to crying. She hates putting her bib on and taking it off - causes extreme crying. She hates being cleaned after food - causes extreme crying. She hates having her nappy changed - this is a 2 person job as she is so strong and resists so much. She hates having her clothes changed - causes extreme crying. If she is put down on the floor to play often she will last a minute or so and then extreme crying. If I play with her she still cries. She hates and resists getting in the car seat - extreme crying. She hates and resists getting into the pram - extreme crying. I feel like I am exaggerating but I am starting to just dread simple tasks with her and I completely feel like I am walking on eggshells with a 6 month old. A lot of the time she is absolutely fine and then suddenly she will just break down into tears and I am not sure why.
Things I have tried hoping that it will improve her mood:
- Sleeping in her own room as she doesn’t sleep very well. This worked for the first few nights but last night she woke up 5 times.
- Weaning - I have been giving her solids and she enjoys it but I was hoping they would fill her up more (hungry baby) but she still seems to need milk (breastfed) all of the time
- Wake windows are now 2.5-3 hours depending on her cues
- Her first nap is around 2 hours after she wakes up
- She goes to sleep between 18:00 - 19:00 in the evening. Her routine is food (solids), bath, book, food (breast milk) and then put into her cot usually drowsy but awake.
- I go out for long walks with her every day
- I see a lot of friends / family with babies
- I attend a baby class every week
- I play with her, read her books
As mentioned above she doesn’t sleep very well anymore. The most she will sleep is for a 3 hour stretch at nighttime and then she cries for food. I have tried to wean off one of the night feeds but she just inconsolably cries and cries which at 1/2am is difficult to endure. On a good night she will wake up around 10/11pm, 1/2am, 4/5am, start the day at 6/7am. I have tried to push her bed time back to see if this helps (it doesn’t). Also a lot of the time if she wakes up just say at 2am, she seems very awake and it can take about an hour to get her back to sleep. I am struggling with the bad sleep met with the bad moods all day. (Before anyone asks, I have a husband who does often get up with the baby in the morning so I can sleep a little more but she is breastfed so I do all of the nights. I often also get woken up by her crying anyway)
I am in contact with my Health Visitor and she is very helpful but of course busy and doesn’t have all of the answers. I am not expecting any from here, but I am just really finding it tough now. I managed well during the first 4 months and when I had light at the end of the tunnel and thought we finally had a happy baby it was wonderful, but now it feels we are back to the beginning and I am struggling very much.
I just want to add I have a very good support system around me - my dad, sister, other family members, friends, husband, in-laws. But obviously I am with the baby all of the time and I feel like a bad mum when I am struggling with her and need others to help me.
Looking for any words of encouragement, advice, just anything. Thank you.