How do others cope with hygiene and glasses battles in pre-teens?

[SoTiredOfAllTheSh17]

My almost 12yr old DD is a nightmare to get in the shower, wash, clean teeth etc it always ends in shouting and arguing. She got glasses (she chose the frames) just before Christmas and found out the last month or so she’s been leaving them at home and not wearing them - so can’t see the board or anything in the distance. Wont believe me that her eyesight will get worse not wearing them (and the optician told her she needs a stable prescription before contact lenses) she wants them now but her hygiene is atrocious!
She won’t believe me about anything and I’m sick of the answering me back and rudeness, how do you cope with pre teens? I need Valium!!

Does she actually smell bad or have bad breath? Because id actually be telling her this if she did. You cant make her wear the glasses though

Yes she does get bo and bad breath but if I say anything even gently she explodes!

She could possibly wear contacts - but to do so would need good hygiene, would that be an incentive if she doesn’t like glasses?

I mean just double check how stable the prescription needs to be, they let 10 year old with contacts and their prescription changes

Assuming this is for short sighted rather than anything more complicated then she does not need a stable prescription to have contact lenses. And tbh (I hate to say this) she doesn’t even need amazing hygiene if she uses daily disposables.

For the teeth brushing and deodorant, the key is to get into a routine. For example I have my deodorant in my pants drawer so I do it right after putting on pants, I taught DD the same as she kept forgetting, now she doesn’t forget. Teeth brushing I believe you can get apps which incentivise (?) maybe they need a fancy toothbrush to work tho.