SEN ? 3 yo DD

[Isthismylifenowandforever]

Just survived 2 weeks off nursery and it’s become clear that my 3 yo DD is behind. She doesn’t seem to have progressed much further than this time last year. Barely listens. Barely follows instructions. Can’t barely have even a rudimentary conversation. I have other DC and can see from her peers that she’s behind. I see my friends going for walks with their 3 yo riding a scooter beside them and want to cry - DD will ride off, never look back, complete liability. She has frequent meltdowns and aggressive behaviour - scratching, biting and shouting and it takes a monumental effort will stop her from doing something she wants to do, and is always focused on distraction because she will not listen to explanations, reasoning, bargaining. I don’t feel this is typical. Does this sound like she could still be NT?

Have nursery mentioned anything OP? Nurseries are usually good at spotting if there are any issues, especially by 3. I also think parental instinct counts for a lot. If you think things aren’t right, definitely speak to nursery, and/or raise concerns with a health visitor.

When was she three? If she's a young three then definitely could all be within the realms of expected development. If she's four next week I'd have more concerns. Can you speak to your HV?

Just turned 3. Nursery have raised concerns because her speech is also behind.

In that case I'd ask for a referral to speech and language as that takes forever anyway. And I'd also get her hearing checked asap. A lot of what you describe could easily be caused by glue ear. We were sure my son could hear perfectly well but a hearing test showed he couldn't hear lower frequencies which then meant his speech was affected (he'd say floh for flower as he couldn't hear the second lower pitch syllable). It would also explain some of the behaviours if she can't hear very well and is also frustrated.

Agree that it could easily be Glue Ear.

How does she score on this progress checker.

Thank you @TinyMouseTheatre , according to that test, she may need additional support.
GP appointment next week. Can I ask for a hearing test referral and SALT support in one go?

She’s definitely frustrated @Pugglywuggly and tries to deal with it by aggression, which is demoralising and just exhausting

Test hearing, check eyesight.

how is her communication and understanding?

makaton signs can be useful if speech is delayed.

She sounds similar to my nearly 3 year old son. He has a one to one in nursery because he’s impossible to manage in a group because of his inability to follow instructions. We don’t have a diagnosis because the waiting list to even see a paediatrician is over a year long, but it’s clear he has some form of additional needs. Have you spoken to your health visitor about your concerns? That’s where I started with getting my son some support.

The waiting lists are so long aren’t they? Have you applied for an ECHP yet? You don’t have to wait for a diagnosis before applying

Yes you absolutely can. The GP will be able to do both of those referrals for you or you could contact the HV this week and ask her to do them

Could poor hearing explain the failure to follow any instructions though, even when we know she understand them? Like if we ask her to stop doing something, she won’t. She’ll continue and lash out verbally and physically.