Daughter 11 separation anxiety

[Readingislife]

What do I do since Xmas daughter cries every Sunday regarding not wanting to go school. Every day she's crying and saying she will miss me.
Everything is good at school.
Nothing is the problem just she's going to miss me.
She starts secondary in Aug 26.
She even has to sleep on my bedroom floor. Which I have limited to weekends but get the tears and up and down with her all night when she's in her room.
She did go through a hormonal spurt around Xmas but this is getting stupid.
I have always been protective of her and she is a real mummies girl and she is a very young 11 whom I'm trying to install confidence into her but failing. My DH says I've molly coddle her to much and I need to be cruel to be kind. She doesn't do anything for herself. I don't know what to do or who to turn too for advise. Any help please?

What is she not doing for herself that an 11 year old should be doing? Does her father have a point?
This seems like two separate issues though. Is there no obvious cause for her sudden need to be next to you all the time.

My 11 year old went through a regression last autumn and I ended up sleeping in with her for 3 months. She's fine now. I think the changes to her body freaked her out as well as hormones surging and she just needed extra support.

Shes an only child so I find i still do lots for her as no siblings to have to share time with me. She's first year of high school and summer born so a young 11.

Hi @Readingislifecan I ask you a few questions to try and understand what’s going on a bit better?

When you say that she’s a very young 11, can you give us a couple of examples?

If she’s fine in school, have you spoken to the Teacher about what’s happening out of school? What did the Teacher say?

What sort of things won’t she do for herself?

And finally, I think it’s worth doing this simple progress checker and seeing if it says tgat she needs sone support

Sorry about the typos

No obvious cause apart from hormonal spurt around same time.

She has no confidence to do things on her own I.e go and pay for some sweets etc/ cross the road/walk downstream to school by herself

I have spoken with school/teacher they say all is good apart from teary on some days. ELSA spoke with her and she just says she misses me.

She won't do things that some of her peers will do I.e. go into shop and pay for things, cross roads, i still have to pick her up/drop off at schools gates. She lacks confidence to do anything on her own and panics overthinks things.

She was a preemie and always lacked behind a little but has caught up eventually.

She will wash and dress herself but I have to get clothes out and run sink/bath and still wash her hair as she refuses. I also have to brush and style her hair.

I see what you mean @Readingislifeand thank you for replying

Did you manage to do the progress checker that I linked to?

It might also be worth reading The Confidence Code to see if you can help her build up some confidence before starting High School.

Has she ever tried any Martial Arts? This could help her to regulate and build confidence. If she doesn’t want to be away from you, maybe you could go together?

And if school have tried ELSA, have they ever had the SENCO to come and assess her?