Children's services mash meeting

[ThatHazelSeal]

Hi, I'll try to keep it short but last week my partner, who is an alcoholic turned quite nasty towards me. I ended up calling the police. This is the first time I've ever had to do this but I was scared. Children's services turned up at my house. I have never had them involved before, they have advised to stop contact with him and the children and they are holding a multi agency meeting. Has anyone had experience of this and what was the outcome.?

Thankyou

@ThatHazelSeal Is he Dad?

Yes he is

I don’t have any personal experience. I’m a professional. The outcome will depend on how much risk there is to the children. And how this risk can be mitigated.

If you live with him you are likely to be required to end the relationship in order to protect your children. The expectation is that you behave protectively even if it risks a marriage or relationship breakdown. A mother is expected to prioritise her children.

If this is the case then you will be supported and social worker would help in terms of money and housing etc.

If contact is allowed then they will talk to you about safety I.e. supervision.

They may decide that the risk is low and close the case. It depends on the circumstances.

Ok I’m gonna be extremely blunt here

he is an alcoholic, he’s not well and if this is the 1st time as you say but mae no changes then it will happen again.

MASH is a voluntary involvement from yourself

if you agree to what they advise you to do and then don’t do it, you will become a concern for safeguarding your children.

stand firm on what he MUST do if you decide to stay with him and stick to your boundaries

Just make sure you get their advice in email so you have evidence you were told that. I had the same advice, was taking steps to leave anyway but sped up my plans and followed advice not to allow any contact. SS decided they had no role as I was protecting the kids. Abusive ex took me to court for contact, SS refused to put into writing they had advised this. I got accused of lying and parental alienation. Ex got contact. He was horrible to the kids and when I went to SS/police about it they just saw the court order and said they couldn’t do anything take it back to court if I’m serious about it- but I had no new evidence other than my word marks on the kid happening with dad etc he just denied everything questioning maybe I did it.

I met a couple other women on the freedom program run by woman’s aid with similar experiences.

get your evidence.

the MASH itself isn’t bad. If you cooperate and protect your kids it will be fine. It’s the lack of evidence when ex takes you to court. I’d recommend doing a SAR as soon as the MASH is concluded if they won’t give you email saying they advise no contact- just in case

100% her evidence of everything, email when communication with MASH.

as for him taking you to court, I’m pretty sure legal aid is no longer available for family court when there’s DV charges

Thankyou. He has been taking steps and has gone for help from alcohol services he did this before this incident happened. He has to do a few things such as AA meetings but they have said they will fund rehab. I will do whatever ss advise me to do having them involved has worried me and I've never had any experience of them before.