Is a child screaming during a hair wash and brush normal?

[Biosblbay]

My son is a nightmare anything to do with his hair. Hair cuts and baths are problematic.

he used to absolutely love baths, but the last 5/6 baths I would say have become so bad that I dread doing them. It results in severe screaming and crying and being told “No Mummy” honestly if you was to hear it, it sounds like I am abusing him or something. The neighbours must be so concerned. I have tried putting his head back in the water, getting him to tilt his head back and using jug and doing it as gently as possible, tried the shower head, even tried using my hands and cupping water but that takes forever and he still hates that, he hates it all. He thrashes now to the point I struggle. Is this normal for a 3 year old and please tell me they grow out of it!?

any tips would be helpful. Thank you x

Yes, most toddlers have a phase of this. Mine was scared I'd get soap in his eyes.

s a toddler it would sound like I was viciously murdering DD every time she needed a hair wash. Now at 11 she will do it (begrudgingly) but still hates the hairdryer, and if I have to help with getting out a tangle or doing a braid she winces and yelps at every little thing. She improved a lot around age 5 though.

My mum said it sounded like my sister and I were being murdered on hair wash night!

Normal, I just used a flannel in the end. He hated haircuts and I ended up finding a barber who used scissors not clippers as he couldn't tolerate the 'buzz' near his ears.

@Edictfromno10@InfoSecInTheCity@Beowolves not that I would wish this on anyone because it’s so tough but I am so glad I’m not the only one who is going through this and also being made to sound as if they are murdering their kids! 🙈 it is so embarrassing, I am actually worried my neighbour will report me at some point haha

@Lightuptheroom luckily my son had a haircut booked in Saturday with a new barber who can use just scissors! Hoping that will be a better experience than the clippers!

Yes. I once heard my neighbours, who were in their garden, say "it must be bathtime" when DS1 started, when DH was indeed bathing him.

My 8 year old is still like this 😂

yes one of mine hated it and tbh I just largely stopped washing or brushing her hair much till she got over it, which she did 😐 She has long, beautiful, well-tended hair today!
I do genuinely think some people have more sensitive scalps/ears...

Yup

Only solution was a short haircut for DD

She wore a hat to walk from the car back to the house, in case the neighbours saw her

She was 3

Yes our son was a real shreaker when having a hair wash in the bath - the only thing that helped was folding a flannel into a rectangle he could hold firmly across his eyes to keep any water and suds away and then being as fast as we could!
The neighbours first thought he'd broken his leg or arm based on all the screaming.

dd was like this too. she still needs to hold a towel over her face and if any drops get on her face she freaks out.

could you try a shower instead, starting slowly from the feet up? and give him notice of what you’re doing “next it’s the tummy, now it’s the shoulders”. etc.

Mine too 😂 hair washes are traumatic for us both 😂

A neighbours child was like this for a bit. They got him swimming googles that he wore during hair washing and used bath bombs for the bath. The screaming then went quieter, at the start it was loud as they needed to keep their bathroom window open for ventilation. Haha the funny thing now is he is a teenager and they complain that he is in the shower for hours now.

Definitely a phase! When DD1 was 3y and DD2 was a baby, I apologised to the neighbours in case they had been woken up in the night by DD2 crying and they said "oh dont worry, we never hear you - we only have hear [DD1] when its hairwashing!" 😳🙈

I don’t know if it’s normal by my DD did this for years. The screaming was that bad once I actually shouted “shut up, shut up now or they’ll ring the police” because I was so stressed, she sounded like she was being murdered.
The only thing that stopped it was swimming lessons.
She’ll fully jump into a swimming pool but still whinge when the shower goes on her face (she’s 8 now) but has finally stopped screaming 😂

Yes, DD was a total squealing nightmare about hairwashes well past age 3. She’s now 18 and wouldn’t be seen dead if her hair wasn’t perfectly groomed and swishy.

I seem to remember that swim goggles helped somewhat, but mainly she just needed to grow out of it. (Which took years - sorry!).

DS wasn’t quite as bad but I didn’t insist on lots of hairwashes unless they were really necessary.

We have to use one of these or we have no hope -

https://amzn.eu/d/0huRGcma

Yep, my son had a phase of this. What worked for us was just one or two baths a week so it wasnt a constant battle. Then whatever distraction we could come up with that made him look up while I rinsed his hair. His dad would blow bubbles or show him picture of trains on his phone, anything really. He grew out of it within a couple of months though and is fine with it now at 3.5 years :)

Very normal ime. Dd was like this till some point when she was 4 she just decided that was it, she was washing her own hair and not crying and she has basically been fine since (obviously we did still help a bit!). I don’t think she liked feeling out of control and no matter how much control over the process we tried to give her, it wasn’t enough!