Hi all
My partner and his ex wife split almost nine years ago and we've all very much moved on since. All the arguments, court dates, childcare arrangements were sorted a long time ago and now there's not really any complaints about either party.
His ex-wife has gone through a number of relationships since and he's never really had reason to be concerned about her partners, but the guy she is seeing at the moment just doesn't seem right and we wondered where he might stand if she were to re-introduce him to our kids (yes, re-introduce)
She met this guy last year and just like her other relationships we had no reason to be concerned. We are happy that she has been able to move on. But his ex-wife's mother could sense that something wasn't right with this guy and did some digging. He claimed that his name was, let's say Joe Bloggs, and that he worked in immigration. One time when he took the kids home his ex wife told him how that day he had found his dad dead and that the funeral would happen in a few weeks. Then, a few days later his two-year old niece died of cancer. We couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy as he was clearly going through a rough time.
Some weeks later we noticed that his ex-wife had removed every trace of him from her socials. It turned out, his name wasn't Joe Bloggs, he didn't have a job, he was a gambling addict, his dad never died and was actually alive and well and there was never a two-year old niece. He also told his parents that my ex-wife's name was something completely different and that she didn't have any kids.
Anyway, his ex-wife confronted him and that was the end of it for a while, but recently we've found out that they are seeing each other again, much to the frustration of us, her mother and also their two kids who have all stressed that they don't want to be near him again.
At the moment he hasn't been re-introduced to them but we feel it's only a matter of time until it happens. We know he hasn't legally done anything wrong, but we worry what this guy might be capable of if he can lie about his entire identity.
Has anyone been in a situation like this? For some context, they have two daughters who are 15 and 12 and are old enough to make their own decisions (they're very clear that they do not want this person in their lives). The problem is, his ex-wife still treats them like much younger children and insists that the shared arrangements we have continue, so if the kids said they wanted to stay with us to not be around him then we anticipate she would tell us we are breaching the court order (50/50 care) and force them to be under the same roof as him.
We are also based in Wales as we know that laws around this are different all over.
Any help or advice would be great.