5yo - how do babies get in mummy's tummy?

[rachelgreen]

My niece, who is 5, asked me how babies get in mummy's tummy, as her mum is pregnant again. I told her it was a special cuddle between mummies and daddies, then the baby grows from a tiny seed (I think she'd asked a fair few people who all told her to ask her mum before reaching me). Is this a naff thing to tell a 5yo? My brother isn't with his ex anymore, so it's a different daddy this time around. I know there are books on this subject for kiddies, but don't want to stand on any toes - my brother obviously didn't have a clue what to tell her, and I suspect her mum hasn't said anything either, given she'd asked us all.

she also kept saying she thinks the baby will like her, she really does think the baby will like her - in a hopeful little voice. I kept telling her how special she is and of course the baby will love her. She's been so excited up to now when I was pg with DS and she just loves DS who is 16mo, she also has 2 baby cousins on her mum's side she just loves, but obviously this is different for her. anybody been through something similar? TIA.

I think the seed thing is ok, but I really don't like "Daddy planted a seed" thereby relegating mother to status of garden soil.

Sorry - was thinking about this the other day, and got very irrationally riled. No help to you at all!

Watching with interest....need some tips for this one
My dd (age 3 last week) asked the same yesterday.
"Mummy, how does the daddy put the baby in the mummy's tummy when it's closed?"

my ds (just 5) asked the same thing about 6 months ago. I just told him the truth. I explained about sex and that it was a special thing between two people who love each other. He was very non-plussed about the whole thing. tbh, i think if they know from an early age its much easier for everyone and it's completely natural anyway - what's there to be ashamed / embarrassed about?

Hmm, except it's probably not a good idea to tell someone else's kid - just in case they dont agree!

i agree - i didn't actually say daddy planted a seed, just the baby grew from one, - but to be honest she was quite happy once I'd said that to continue playing hide n'seek, i think it was more that nobody would give her an answer of any description. - TBH, most of her classmates have siblings now, so i suspect the playground rumbles will give her a different insight anyway!

In my view you only answer the questions that they actually ask. I answered to my dcs 5 + 6 that mummy and daddy love eachother very much and because of that we were able to make a baby. They were both happy with that and didn't ask anymore questions, if they ask how did it get in there..... I'll think again.

I went through this, quite successfully I thought, until DD (6) asked me how 2 ladies would get a baby if they were gay and one of them didn't have a seed! Honestly, you think you've covered all the bases!

You need someone like Franny (I think it is her anyway) who is really good about giving straightforward and honest explanations about things like this.

I am sure that others will be along soon with other good suggestions.

Wrt to telling someone else's kid, imo if the child is with you long enough to have these type of conversations, then I think it is ok to talk to them about stuff. Assuming it is not a random child that got chatting to you at the park or whatever!

DS1 (7) asked me what his balls were for the other day. I said it was to store his future babies in when he is a grown up.

Cue questions about how will it meet the mummy's eggs etc. Tried to run away be brief.

He does know about mummy's monthly bleed though.

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I think Cod is right, my oldest dd is 4 but asks a lot of questions. She wanted to know where babies come out (she hasn't asked how they get in so I haven't broached that yet).

I briefly described caesarean and vaginal births. Apparently she thinks she would prefer a caesarean.

I kind of like it that she knows some stuff already and that is how she will learn - bit by bit so it's not some big "chat" at around age 10 like I had. (actually I had a book as my parents wouldn't tell me in person which I think is sad)

I did tell him.

I was just brief about it.

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At 5 I was vague-ish. Now that my son is six and has asked again, I told him very matter of fact what happens, but not to great detail.

Same with questions such as "mum can girls marry girls and boys marry boys?" Which they can here, and have equal right to both adopt and get artificial insemination (not males of course), etc...