I couldn't find a topic on this issue, so posting here.
I live in Europe, my mum is in UK. She is 82. She has lived alone the past 30 years and has always been very organised and independent. Past two years I've noticed a definite change in her memory and cognition, like not understanding how to transfer money, asking me when my birthday is, not remembering a niece who grew up in the same town, can't clearly explain to me why she went to the doctor and what the doctor said etc. This has got much worse over the past year. Since she is such a highly regulated systematic person she more or less is OK with her daily routines. I visit every 2 months, work full time and teens so can't go more often. She has friends nearby but not very close. She still goes to choir, some social events etc. Place is not very clean and I clean when I go but realised this wasn't sustainable. I've organised a cleaner but she keeps saying she doesn't need it or only needs it once a month etc (It's only for 2 hours every 2 weeks). It's not about money as she can afford it. My plan right now is to go with her to GP while I'm next there and see if they can help her with a diagnosis, and get this 'permission to discuss' form, and I will also call the local AGE UK dementia coordinator and ask for advice. But the refusing the cleaner thing is starting to really worry me. I can't just leave her to get more and more confused, my aim is for her to keep her independence as long as possible, but it will be very tricky convincing her to have any support. Even for example a volunteer visitor would be great. Not really sure what to do when we cross that line where I honestly think she is not safe alone (not there yet).