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Original poster

How soon/often to leave new baby with relatives?

17 replies

lucysnowe · 15/06/2008 12:35

Hi all

I've left my DD with her (paternal) grandparents for a couple of afternoons since she was born - she's nine weeks now. When I told my mum she was surprised and told me she didn't leave me with my granny till I was six months (I was breastfed tho). Is there is a consensus on when it is too early? I confess I enjoyed the time alone with DH but did worry about bonding etc...

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Pollyanna · 15/06/2008 12:44

my ds2 is 9 weeks, I have left him in the past week a couple of times (but I was waiting for bfing to be established so that I could express).

I don't think there is a right time - just when it feels right for you tbh.

MissKubelik · 15/06/2008 12:48

Sounds fine to me, as long as you are happy with the arrangement and don't feel pressured into it. I didn't leave my DD for a few months, but then I breastfed and never got the hang of expressing, so I was a bit more restricted. I think a nice break every now and again is very good for all of you!

AbbeyA · 15/06/2008 14:11

It sounds fine-and lovely for the grandparents.

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Original poster
lucysnowe · 16/06/2008 11:40

Thankyou!

OP posts:
MichC · 17/06/2008 14:59

It is when it feels right that it is right!! I left DS with grandparents overnight for the first time when he was 5 weeks. Loys of horrified looks from friends but so what!

We now leave him overnight with grandparents at least once a month. He loves it and we get time to be us.

You can be the only judge!

ConnorTraceptive · 17/06/2008 15:05

It differs for everyone and in my experience even differs from baby to baby. DS1 I left with a close friend at 9 weeks so I could go to a wedding. DS2 is 3 months and hasn't been left with anyone else yet. Don't know why I don't feel ready this time I just don't.

swiftyknickers · 17/06/2008 15:09

DS was 2 weeks old when i left him with paternal grandparents and had a well deserved night out-managed till 8 oclock and was asleep by 9!!

its whatever you feel comfortable with-your mum may have a touch of the green eyed monster

ChairmumMiaow · 17/06/2008 15:14

SIL took DS to do the school run and into town for an hour or two at a couple of weeks. I had to know DS was close enough that he wouldn't work himself up too much if he had got hungry, but other than that, I enjoyed the sleep.

oopsadaisyangel · 17/06/2008 15:16

DS1 was left overnight with grandparents at 6 weeks - we had been given an all expenses paid meal out for me and Mr Oops as a present from one of our friends when babyoops was born. I had half a bottle of wine with the meal and feel asleep in the car on the way home!! DS now 6 loves staying at his grannys and would live there is we (and she) would let him! {grin]

oopsadaisyangel · 17/06/2008 15:17

see even the thought of the wine has be slurring already!!

should be if we (and she) would let him!

Anna8888 · 17/06/2008 15:18

This is fine - lucky you to have such willing babysitters

caykon · 17/06/2008 15:29

left my dd at just 2 days with my sister for a couple of hours, to make an apperence at a family wedding reception

MrsThierryHenry · 17/06/2008 15:31

Have never left DS (now 18 mo) with his grandparents. He only has paternal ones, and sadly DH and I just don't trust his mum enough .

PortAndLemon · 17/06/2008 15:39

I don't do it until mine are a bit older (I think it was about 4/5 months with DS), because I'm breastfeeding and no good at expressing milk. But if I weren't, and they were willing, I'd do it earlier. I'd leave her for a couple of hours now if I fed her just before I went.

Bridie3 · 17/06/2008 15:41

You're happy. The baby's happy. The grandparents are happy.

Sounds perfect.

Lucifera · 17/06/2008 16:26

My friends came to spend a night in my house with their daughter when she was 11 days old, they had my bedroom in the basement and I slept on the first-floor living-room sofa with her in her basket. I had a bottle for her - can't remember if it was expressed or formula (this was in 1980!). I'd never looked after a tiny baby before and I don't think I actually slept at all; she woke, fed, was changed, did a huge poo and so it went on for the night. But I do remember the magic of being with her, feeling how strong and vital she was, even tho' so tiny ... I'm going to her wedding later this year.
This sounds a bit off-track, but my point is, it's fantastic for anyone who wants to be a significant adult in a child's life to be able to bond with them very early on. I think it will be brilliant for the OP's baby and the grandparents.

Kelix · 28/06/2008 00:04

My DD stays with her Nanna (my mum) every friday night to give us time to spend as a couple which I think is great! She has been doing this since she was about 6 week old. She loves staying with her Nanna I think its good to introduce them to other people at a young age, She is 5 1/2 months now and is very sociable. Everyone has different opinions but my mum loves spending time with her and she loves it too. Also gives me and fella some time together and keeps our relationship as strong as ever! Everyone is happy

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