We’ve always said we wanted three children. Our first is 3 and our youngest is 8months. A boy and a girl. There’s a huge part of my rational brain telling me I am done at two children. But I feel so SAD thinking I’ll never have another baby. I’m 32 now and so a third baby would need to be around 35 years old as I wouldn’t want to be older than this having a baby.
My children aren’t good sleepers and so parenting is very tiring!I worry about the long term affects of fatigue on my health and wellbeing and I feel I would struggle to give three children the attention they need. We are financially stable but I worry about the financial burden a third child would bring(family holidays/ university / days out) I also worry about navigating the years of after school clubs and activities if we had three children. We do have supportive family but I worry that a third child would hinder that support as I think it might be unfair to ask family to look after three children, especially if my sister has children like she plans to because she’ll need help from them too. I know that having three young children would be hard or near impossible to manage for me.
On the other hand I cannot stop thinking about a third baby but when I do I focus more on the pregnancy (I loved pregnancy!) and the newborn snuggles. I also think of having three older children and then in future three adult children and the fullness of my home (in a good way!). I love the idea of a big family but I worry the reality would be very different.
How did you know you’re done? How did you know you wanted a third?
Am I simply grieving the idea of my third child because I know I’m at mental/emotional capacity?? Or am I just in the thick of having two very young children?