Daughter doesn't want to do anything

[Leigh58xx]

My daughter is nearly 8 (only child) and never wants to do anything. After school she just wants to play games on her tablet or watch TV. I try to limit screen time but she finds playing "boring" its constantly raining so we can't do anything outdoors and we can only afford to do a day out a couple of times a month usually on a sunday. We sometimes do colouring but that's about it. She doesn't like any clubs we've tried a few. Any one else child the same?

Screens are so much fun and relaxing and addicting, it’s not surprising she prefers them

I have the same trouble trying to tempt my dc to play board games - they’d rather watch a film !

What kind of clubs have you tried? My ds loves swimming and I take him once a week.

If you’re only ‘trying’ to limit screen time she has no incentive to play. I’d limit the screen time, stick to it, and let her be bored. I bet she’ll eventually find something to do.

Play dates?
Crafts?
Library
Free museusm? Most areas have a facebook/instagram account of free and cheap local activities for children

I found that generally "trying to restrict" screens never really worked and just made them more attractive. Instead, we have specific times of the day which are screen free (the morning for us, but I appreciate that wouldn't suit everyone). She moaned for ages but has now accepted it and actually plays (while listening to her Yoto).

Thanks your comments, its my first time posting on here and realised i said "i try to limit screen time" her screen time is limited to 2hrs but then she is just bored, but youre right they have to be bored to spark imagination. We have tried gymnastics, choir and art club. She is really shy, so finds it all overwhelming. I am going to try more play dates i think 😊

Do you include TV in that limit? If not, 2 hours is quite a lot of screen time at 8 in my experience.

My DC were very restricted on screen time up until secondary school. It was hard work, but kids do learn to entertain themselves, go to clubs and so on if there is no alternative. Any longer than 30 mins on screens was a "special treat". DD is more introverted so found clubs a but overwhelming at the start and we went into lockdown when she was smaller, so that didn't help. But the real thing is just to keep trying and eventually something will click. But reduced screen time has to be part of that, and a plan for entertaining her while you wean her off it.

If she's likes games, then could you teach her something like chess? One of mine would happily play online games for ages if I let him, but he also likes real life games too, so i try to encourage those instead. It's a bit old fashioned but card games are popular too, like whist or solitaire If she plays alone. Helping you cook tea? Go for a walk (even if you don't have a dog).

YY I find with my DC, when they have more screen time than unoccupied time, they really struggle to know what to do with themselves because they are so used to reaching for the nearest screen.

It's not even about amounts IME, it's literally just the ratio. So filling up their time with more clubs and playdates doesn't usually help (although agree they are nice things to do!) because if 2 hours is more than half the time she has after school, which it could well be if you discount dinner, homework, getting home and then a bedtime wind-down routine, she'll probably never quite be getting out of the "ugggggghhhh a screen would be easier" mode.

If she likes colouring you could try out some different crafty kits - painting by numbers, cross stitch, friendship bracelets, things like that? There are some good doodle journals which are fun. Does she like baking? Do you have any hobbies you might be able to share with her? Board games can be good as well.

What kind of games does she like to play on the tablet?

School is really intense for a lot of children, you say she doesn't want to do anything but she's already done a lot of things, maybe she just wants to rest her brain and do something that doesn't tax her at all. You don't have to get her to do clubs if she doesn't want to.
I would suggest letting her hang out at home and be bored, but be ready with some options if she wants to do something.