15mo sleep issues - are we making it worse

[SKLM]

Our 15mo is waking up at 4am and I am wondering if we are turning it into a habit.

Our little boy usually sleeps from 7-6am, maybe even a little later. Occasionally he wakes up in the night, but with a quick cuddle and being put back down in his own cot goes back to sleep.

Since starting nursery in September he has had a lot of bugs. About a month ago he had an ear infection which was treated with antibiotics and we have noticed his first molar coming through right now. He has been quite unsettled generally at times.

A few weeks ago he started waking up at 4am. We tried some cuddles for reassurance but he wouldn't settle back and was wide awake. So, after a week of battling with him to go back to sleep we began starting his day at this time. I.e going downstairs, playing, breakfast etc.

He has maintained 1-2 naps in the day, he is probably close to dropping down to 1 too.

So we feel stuck as he is now routinely waking up at 4. He is not unwell at present. The tooth is coming through slowly, he is eating properly in the day so I don't think he is hungry. Maybe discomfort continues to wake him up.

Should we be trying a bit harder to get him to stay in bed? Atm out of frustration I think we are getting him up pretty promptly as we are worried he is in discomfort and needing us but at this age I am also wondering if we should be doing pick up/put down a bit more strictly?

I feel a bit stuck. I don't want to encourage bad habits, but at the same time I know he is teething and probably not feeling great. I don't have a problem getting up early with him if he needs it, but equally don't want it to be forever of course!

Any advice welcome xx

It sounds like his sleep needs are changing, he’s having quite a lot of sleep for his age. I would say he definitely needs to be on one nap for his age, and you could also try a slightly later bedtime. He’s not sleeping beyond 4 because by that time he’s having all the sleep he needs for the night. So if you cut out one of the naps and try a bedtime of maybe 7:30 to start with you’ll probably see he starts sleeping later in the morning

We have the exact same thing with my almost 15 month old. Waking between 4-5am everyday and not going back to sleep.

We tried one nap for a week and she was completely miserable and a nightmare and it only improved the wake time to 5:30am. We've gone back to two naps so I don't know what the solution is now.

I would try changing to one nap and also try cosleeping from 4 to see if you can get him to go back to sleep.

I feel for you, the 4am wake ups are hard.

Pick up put down won't work at 4am, he's too awake.

My son is 16 months and he wakes at 4am ocasionally. Usually when unwell or teething. We give calpol, milk and cuddles and it takes abot 20-30 minutes of cuddles but he does go back to sleep. It is a lot of effort and we have to be very, very patient. But it pays off as he does sleep through when he's well. I don't think 4am is right to start the day.

He seems quite old for 2 naps, I'd aim for 1 decent nap a day. 2-3hrs sometime between 11-3pm

Thank you everyone, this has been really helpful. I totally agree about the 1 nap.. we managed to get him down to 1 nap a couple of months ago, then he was poorly on and off for weeks and needed more sleep. It feels like a good time to try to get down to 1 again and try a later bed time.

He should really have cut the second nap a while ago, he’s had all the sleep his body needs come 4am! Shouldn’t be sleeping more than two hours at this age really.
His early wakes may also have turned into a habit wake. They can be hard to crack without this sort of intervention. Times vary a bit depending on where you read, but essentially you preempt the wake by setting your alarm (yes, I know, horrible) anywhere between 20-40 mins before they typically wake. Give them a little nudge that disturbs them slightly but definitely doesn’t wake them up. This re-sets their sleep cycle and after a few days they should then sleep another cycle, waking up at a better time.

Try using the pick-up/put-down method to avoid reinforcing the 4am wakeup. Be consistent and avoid starting the day too early unless he’s fully awake. Gradually adjust his nap or bedtime if needed to help him sleep longer.

I personally wouldn’t get up with him, no. He does need the sleep, but he simply needs more support from you settling back to sleep. I always just brought mine into bed when this happened. Kept lights low and everything quiet and just waited it out. It will get better, but this is pretty normal. It simply sounds like you’ve had an easy ish time with sleep and now having a normal blip. It will pass if you just stick with it.

Thanks everyone x

Sleep needs for a 15 month old are 11-14 hours over a 24 hour period, with 10-12 of those as nighttime sleeps hours. I do think he's probably either getting too much daytime sleep, or his bedtime is too early, or a combination of the two.

Hi everyone.

Thanks for your input yesterday thought I would update you on our first night last night.

So his wake up has been 3.30-4.

Yesterday we reduced his day time sleep and put him to bed for 7.30 so 30 mins later.

He woke at 5.10. he did try to get back to sleep. He was whining and laying down. Every 10 mins I went in and gave him a cuddle and reassured him, put him back down, kept it dark in the room and went back to bed myself. He stayed in his bed awake until 6.10 which was massive progress. We were happy to get him up any time after 6 so we started the day then.

Aiming for just 1 nap today and we'll see if that improves things any further.

Not a bad start 😊

@SKLMgreat start! It’ll probably take several days or even a couple of weeks of perseverance before noticing a bigger change! Keep going with it! X

@gentlemum thank you for the encouragement 😊i'm feeling optimistic. I was worried it would be just the same this morning so I was really encouraged that he woke up later x