Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Can’t get our toddler out of our bed!

7 replies

MrsS2b · 17/01/2026 22:41

DD is soon to be 3 and we can not for the life of us get her out of sleeping in our bed. She’s still waking multiple times in the night. She doesn’t have day time naps, they’ve been long gone! She attends nursery full time so is on the go all day. Even in the cold winter weather we wrap up every evening and go for a little local walk “around the block” her and her older sibling. She attends swimming lessons every Saturday so she’s active for her age. Tea, bath, story and bed. She’s a dream going asleep. No issues, in her own bed and she’s asleep in the matter of 15/30 minutes by 7:30. Come 10pm she’s awake rattling at her bedroom door. She will not allow us to sooth her back asleep in her own bed. She will carry on kicking and screaming so yes we give in and let her into ours. Building a rod for our own backs but we’re tired and fiancé is up 5am for work and we don’t want her waking her sibling too. She will fall asleep very quickly in our bed so we transfer her into her own but she doesn’t last. Give it 40 mins to a hour and she’s up again. Same carry on. Multiple times a night in the end we just leave her in our own bed. We are exhausted, we’re not sleeping properly. We can’t spend time a couple in bed and it’s really taking a toll on our relationship. We are a very intimate couple and we really enjoy that time together. At the moment we can’t even have a cuddle in bed. It’s frustrating and exhausting. We’ve tried everything and nothing seems to work, people say it won’t last long but right now it feels like an eternity and it will never end. Any tips for two exhausted parents??

OP posts:
Mullaghanish · 17/01/2026 22:46

Throw a single bed next to your bed.. or a slide a cot mattress on the floor. That you can ease her onto.. and wrap her in a blanket in bed she won’t be like this at 5.. she’ll grow out of it.. in the meantime you need sleep.. don’t stress, no parenting journey is perfect… she’s loved and cared for..

Lightsandrainbows · 17/01/2026 22:51

Single mattress of the floor of your room
or get her a double bed and one of you sleep next to her in it?
what would happen if you both left and went and slept in her room and left her in your room?
why can’t you have a cuddle? she’s not there for 40+ minutes and if cuddle isn’t a euphemism, can’t you still cuddle when she’s in there?

hby9628 · 17/01/2026 22:58

we had this issue & ended up just accepting it & getting a super king bed so not sure I’m the best to advise you. I just decided we all needed sleep & not to stress about it. You DD is just seeking comfort. It’s not ideal but she will grow out of it.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

AnneLovesGilbert · 17/01/2026 22:59

Mattress on the floor in your room with a nice blanket/cover and a pillow, she can come in and sleep there. Won’t happen immediately but she needs to be close to you when she wakes, maybe bad dreams? and then at least you’ll have your bed. Do she and her sibling have different rooms? Would they like to share?

Our older one moved to her own room at 2 but carried on coming in at some point in the night, silently and just sneaking in between us and going straight have to sleep so no issues, for years.

When I was pregnant and getting quite hefty and knew I’d be having a c section we started worrying about her accidentally kicking me post CS or the baby not being safe if they ended up bed sharing with us so we made a floor bed in our room and said she was more than welcome but she needed to be on the floor bed not our bed.

The night before we had the second one she did a whole night in her bed, she was 4, and she rarely ever came in to us at night after that and would have a cuddle then go back to her room.

Have sex once the kids are asleep, before you’re too tired and starting to stress you’ll be interrupted. Be creative about where and yes it’s a bit weird to get used to at first but if we hadn’t prioritised doing it early evening it wouldn’t have happened for ages and we might not have had the second baby.

Clumpled · 17/01/2026 23:00

Silly question but does she still have a toddler duvet? Ours used to get in with us then as soon as we got her a proper single duvet she slept through. She must have been waking from the cold but unable to settle.

MilkMonster654 · 18/01/2026 00:28

Surely by 10, you have plenty of time to be romantic. She's quite little I don't think there is anything you but lean into it. Accept it, let her stay and all 3 of you sleep through the night.

Plenty of us slept with our parents growing up, i needed my mum until I was 7-8.

CurlewKate · 18/01/2026 00:58

Not worth the struggle. The most sleep for the most people was always my motto.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page