7yo son constantly screaming or making loud noises

[LegoVsFoot]

It's giving me the rage. He can't be quiet. He is CONSTANTLY making extremely loud noises, wailing, making unnecessary sounds, animal noises, sometimes shouting randomly right into my ear. Nothing stops him. Punishment just makes him scream more loudly, and then go back to making the same noises. He doesn't do it at school or with other people, just at home.

What is happening?? How can I make it stop? I am on my last nerve.

I'm sorry, that sounds absolutely awful. If he's only doing it with you then it sounds to me like he's doing it to get a reaction from you. What happens if you just ignore him, as hard as that must be to do? Or if he's right in your face, walking away saying you need to fold the laundry or something like that? Then when he is being quiet, go back to him and join whatever activity he's doing so he gets your attention again.
Do you have any support so you can get a break from him occasionally? Can he stay with grandparents overnight?

Someone will be along soon to tell you he’s autistic. Not doing it outside the home is masking blah
blah blah

I am a single parent which makes it harder. I do get up but he follows me around and opens the door. We will be sitting down together and he will lean over and suddenly make a loud deranged cartoon noise right into my ear which makes my ears ring. I get angry and he gets upset and says I'm angry at him and starts shouting more.

It seems like an unconscious habit, but it's so stressful hearing these constant loud noises.

It makes me feel awful because it aggravates me so much and I don't want to constantly feel that way. He does clubs, sports, play dates, so his energy is being expended daily. It just feels like it's a reflex for him to open his mouth and make loud noises.

Punishing him for something he may not be able to help seems unfair, he maybe able to hold this in while out as he knows he would be looked down upon outside the home so then lets it all out when he feels safe at home, maybe it’s some sort of Tourettes/vocal tics. Take him to the doctors.
maybe put some calming music on to drown out the noise a bit and calm him down and try not to punish him for something he can’t help you will just make the compulsion worse.

How he have a lot of screen time?
Are you giving him enough attention and quality time spent together to rest and relax?

However annoying it is for you I would say it sounds like his nervous system needs a reset which will have positive results for you both. No need to leap to thinking he has additional needs.

I say this as a single parent too, I have very little down time too, I get it.

I would take him to the Doctors and try to get a paediatrician or Speech and Language referral. And a hearing check.
I wouldn’t punish but might reward when he doesn’t (stickers). And lots of reminders of inside voice.
But I wouldn’t punish also try to get him outside in the fresh air, as much as possible, for my own sanity as much as anything.

Earplugs?

Has he always done this or is it a new habit?

Have you asked him why he does it? Maybe talking about it will help? Sorry if this is over simplifying things but hopefully, at 5, he might be able to start articulating how he feels and why he's doing it? Xx

I think before insisting on a referral to Paediatrician or SaLT it might be worth doing this simple progress checker first

He's 7, not 5, and this sounds like a weak "gentle parenting" approach to what is almost certainly just bad behaviour (given that he only does it to his mum).

He does it to his Mum because she is his safe person. I agree with a previous PP, it can be a result of a dysregulated nervous system, this can happen in NT kids or could be a sign of ND. My daughter does it and I don't have much advice, other than trying to squash it usually makes it worse. Sometimes all the extra curricular can be over-whelming the nervous system contributing to challenging behaviour; rather than tiring the child out and improving behaviour. We had improvements in our daughter's behaviour when we decreased activities and lowered demands.

Welcome to having 7 year olds! Bloody loads of them do it. I need a sedative after DS’s birthday parties and play dates. And no, the worst offenders for screaming amongst DS’s friends are not ND.

I recommend making them play in the garden, them running about and screeching at each other is far more bearable outside.

They do grow out of it. 6-8 seems to be peak age unfortunately.

@TheOccupier my bad - not sure where I got 5 from! Thanks. Even so, I stand by the asking him first. I don't agree with a gentle parenting approach. I think it makes kids badly behaved, treating them too much like adults when they are kids and need boundaries, discipline and they need to be taught that respect is earned. I certainly don't gentle parent my own kids.

And yet, there's no harm in actually talking with your child. It might be something they don't even realise they are doing or it could be triggered by something worrying them or a whole host of other things. Or it could just be bad behaviour. If you don't ask, though, you could be resorting to discipline without actually addressing an underlying problem. It doesn't hurt.

@Tigerbalmshark Thank you, this gets the nail on the head I think! It's frustrating and tiring to go through when I'm tired and he has a lot of energy that comes out this way. They usually play in the garden but not in this weather which makes it worse!

Thanks everyone for your replies x