Recommendations of books to balance GF, BW etc

[cornflakegirl]

My friend is expecting, and I've lent her some baby books. I had GF and the Baby Whisperer, because I'm quite a rules-based person. I suggested she balance them with some lentil-weaving books, but couldn't recommend anything. Any suggestions?

"What to Expect when you're expecting" is great (as is "What to Expect the First Year") are good as they answer the basics and they give varying points of view for things. I also liked The Johnson Mother and Baby book as it covered from conception to 2 yrs of age in terms of development (emotional, behavioral etc.)

Birth and Beyond covers minus 9 to plus 9 months. This is definately a more 'lentil-weaving' book and it includes conventional and complementary therapies. I read it when I was pregnant and it gave me a realistic picture of birth and gave me the confidence to listen to my body during labour - I found it really empowering. Have a look at the link - it gets rave reviews on Amazon.

MN!

SPB - I agree! But she's not soundly wildly convinced so far...

Thanks for the other suggestions - will check them out.

'What to Expect...' is anything but 'lentil weaving'.
I really liked 'Three in a Bed' by Deborah Jackson. Not just about co-sleeping, but baby psychology and some anthropology thrown in, but easy and interesting to read.

Tell her to ditch the baby books altogether -- by and large they are contradictory, unintuitive, prescriptive, and guaranteed to make you feel like a crap mother.

MN is much better and it's free!

How about 'The No-Cry Sleep Solution'? Pretty much the opposite of GF I think.

I like Penelope Leach. She talks common sense and it's very baby/child centred.

• oh - and 'What mothers do - especially when it looks like nothing'

The No-Cry Sleep Solution is a great one and a good alternative viewpoint from GF etc.

I also liked Three in a Bed.

I haven't read The Continuum Concept, but it's very lentil-weavy.

And Unconditional Parenting (not really for babies, I suppose)

Baby-led Weaning: Helping Your Baby Love Good Food by Gill Rapley and Tracey Murkett

I read No-Cry Sleep Solution when I was pregnant. Didn't like it because I'd already decided that we weren't going to have any sleep problems . Feel more sympathetic to it now that I know I could never leave DS to cry - but these days all my parenting advice comes from mumsnet!

Three in a Bed and Continuum Concept sound like the sort of thing I'm looking for - will look into them. Might be a bit early yet for BLW (plus I'll just give her the link to Aitch's blog! )

Anything by William and Martha Sears, maybe The Baby Book?

Sorry, meant to say - not sure how much of a pregnancy book NCSS is? Maybe it's just me, but her thing of "I know what I'm doing will probably give my child bad sleep habits, but he's so cute and snuggly" just felt a bit weird to me. Have I just selectively remembered the bad bits?

Aren't you after baby books, not pregnancy books?

NCSS is more

STEP 1: "if you like snuggling with your baby, then that's fine" -- i.e. if it's not a problem for you to [rock your child to sleep / demand feed at night / whatever] then doesn't magically become a problem just because other people try to tell you that it is. If you are happy, stop worrying.

STEP 2: If it is a problem for you, and you do want to change the behaviour, then here are some suggestions...

The thing I did find about it was that it had suggestions for establishing good sleep routines from newborn, and for fixing sleep problems from 4/5 months, but very little on what to do with a 2-3 month old whose sleep you feel needs a bit of fine-tuning.

Definitely Penelope Leach. Not over the top. Just very sensible, gentle baby-led parenting help. Loved it.

Port - yeah, didn't really mean pregnancy book. Don't remember it having stuff about sleep routines for newborns - maybe I knew it all already by the time I read it

Not sure where my copy is, to be honest, because coincidentally I too now know it all (being on DC2)

Bottom line is that everyone has their own preferences. Your friend should go check out a couple at a bookstore and see which ones appeal to her and her style of parenting. After all, there isn't one baby manual for a reason...all children are different, as are their parents.

Our Babies Ourselves - Meredith Small. Looks at how both biology and culture shape how we look after babies - shows how many different ways there are of doing it as opposed to the prescriptive methods of GF and BW.