Dummy obsessed 2 year old

[Amy5261]

My 2.5 year old is absolutely OBSESSED with her dummy, if it’s not in her mouth she is repeatedly screaming the word ‘dummy’ until we give in and she has it back. A few weeks ago we lost all her dummies and I thought great she can’t have them now - an hour later we were on the way to buy more as she was wore me down so quickly.

The dummy fairy came to my DS at about this age but I honestly don’t think it will work for DD.

Any tips?? I know I need to be stronger ultimately and just get through some screaming, but she is honestly SO strong willed and does not give up so any tips to make it even slightly easier would be amazing.

im not even bothered about it going completely - if we could get it to just sleep time and car journeys I’d be happy!!

thank you!

So if for instance toh were to say you can have it at night, and then try and distract her, how would that go? Is she used to you saying how things will be and then doing it or is she used to you caving at some point?

Distracting does not work - this morning I have managed to get it off her a few times and immediately gone into games/stories/dancing and within 5 mins she is screaming for it. Oh she is absolutely used to us caving - terrible parenting and we try soo hard to hold out but I honestly cannot tell you how wearing she is - literally does not give up, does not take no for an answer on anything! These second children are a different breed 🙃

The only thing that’s going to work is saying no and meaning it. That’s it. She knows that if she keeps it up long enough she gets what she wants.

I'll be honest.
We did them at night only amd some 'scope creep' which i shut down on hard so we had marginally less drama.

My dd was headstrong so had to pick it.
We stopped any new gifts or toys for 6 months?!?! And talked about dummy fairy a lot. She eventually wrote a letter just before 3rd birthday....

In your shoes id either wait it out or just commit on a froday and know it'll be a lonnnnnng weekend.

Id be inclined to go for long weekend if the dummy in is almost permanently for demtal reasons...

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If you’re going to cave anyway then there is no point in saying no? Assuming she’s NT I would say no and meant it. A ND might need handling in a slightly different way.

And definitely speak to the Dentist about her dummy use.

From what you're describing, it seems like you want an outcome where she happily accepts no dummy during the day and you don't have to hold the boundary. But is that really realistic even with all the strategies out there? If she does get upset and cross... What are the barriers to you not caving? Might be more of an adult issue than her issue x

How do you want this to pan out op you wont stop giving her a dummy because she screams for her dummy,
you can wean her off it slowly that might be easier, so you don't answer her if she has her dummy in her mouth, she has to take it out
she can't go out with her dummy it stays at .home or in her pocket, i don't think you want to do the work though you just want her to accept it.

My Daughter was like this and still had a dummy at a similar age. She was absolutely obsessed with it.

We went firm and just threw them all away. There were tears and she still asked for it until about 4 years old. I think going cold turkey is the only way forward. Let her kick off. My Daughter doesn’t sound as strong willed as yours though, so I don’t doubt it would be a bit harder.

I don’t think giving the dummy at certain times will help the situation though because she knows they’re still there and will keep asking.

She will get used to it once it’s gone.

This is the perfect time of year, you can hang them all up on the tree and the fairy can take them away
get an elf and s/he can take them
Father Christmas removes them on Christmas Eve to take to “little babies”

you have afew options

my daughter was the same - I just “forgot” to take them on holiday and I’d boxed them all up and there was none on holiday and that was that!!! She was nearly 3 it was a pain and so when I got pregnant with my next one I vowed no dummies and stuck to my guns!!! I just never introduced them! I worked out I must have spent a fortune on them too as she’d only like the tommee tipped ones! X