How to know you’ve chosen the right area for your kids!

[Wilis]

Have just brought our first family home. Have two children 3 and 8 but have been really anxious what if we’ve made a mistake! Just wondering from other parents how do you decide on such a big step?

What aspects are you anxious about? Most homeowners live or at least have some knowledge of the area before they buy, but I appreciate that is not always possible. Is it near to your childrens school and friends, or will they need to move? Why did you decide on the area if it is a new one? What did you like about it which prompted looking at properties? As even if you had never been to the area before buying there was presumably some draw (jobs? family?) to make you pick this area above all of the other areas.

For what its worth, I think all FTB must have an "oh gosh what if this is a big mistake" when they pick up the keys. I certainly did, and that was without kids on the scene. The second move was easier as we knew what we were doing and it was the "financially sensible" thing to upsize given we could afford it. The third move (first with a child) was more complex as it was international due to my husband's job, but again, we did our research and decided it would be a good thing for us to do.

We’re both kids from council estates in east London, have saved for 8 years as we’ve always wanted to buy our own house in hopes of bettering our future and for our children’s sake. We’ve only moved 30 miles from our old area (30 minutes drive / but a hour in traffic sometimes more). We picked this area in all honesty as it was the best out of all our options we ofcourse were limited with price, our wants/needs and not wanting to go too far out as although we don’t want to be back in London further afield in Essex hasn’t ever appealed to us and my partner has to work in London everyday so wanted him to actually get home to see the kids before bed also. We sort of want the best of both worlds plus daughter wants to stick to her football club in London which we can do from here. The area itself sort makes me feel a bit towny, it’s great in the way of having loads of areas close by I spose I’m not used to Essex living at all yet. Overall, there’s a couple primary schools that seem good, it’s close to london still so we’ve not gone too far for our area we have loads of family in London but friends and some family all around us really within the same sort of distance but it’s just the fact it gives me this sad, small town vibe that the thought of living here forever makes me depressed. I researched as much as I could but even looking into secondary schools they seemed great since being here were hearing otherwise and it’s so hard to now think of the positives. Admittedly our game plan was first house, few years here while they’re in primary school in hoping if we still thought it’s ok but we like other close by areas we could move as eldest would be changing for secondary school anyways. But now I’m terrified if come that point she doesn’t want to (say makes friends or wants to stay in the area we are) I’m worried it’l force us to stay here and what if I still feel this way with the parts I dislike about it. Friends are telling me not to overthink or think too far ahead just go with it let them have friends in this area and even if we do move itl hopefully be within 20 minute drive radius of our current area so it’l be nice they still have friends close by but I’m terrified of change, first ever move in my entire life, so I’m going through alot of emotions anyway but just lost sight of the positives and how to know this is the right place for us and the kids.

You go by your gut feeling and if you love it. I can’t say it’s something I gave much thought to. It was more a matter of picking a house we loved that would give us the right lifestyle and an area of the country that felt right for us in terms of things to do, quality of life, safety, commute. We’ve done lots of small moves (within 10 minutes), but only 1 big move, to 2 hours away.

We chose the area because of the quality of life, things to do, how easy it would be fus to commute, affordability, and how much we loved the house. It’s slightly different here as we aren’t locked into a choice of primary (several options, none oversubscribed). I visited a couple and liked them both, we chose the closest and because it was slightly bigger.

In terms of schools though, it’s very changeable. When we moved here, our secondary was Ofsted outstanding (old report), a couple years later when my eldest started, it’s requiring improvement. 🤷🏻‍♀️ You can plan and worry all you want, but you can’t control everything.

But yes, you’re overthinking it. Live your life. Make friends. Create a community. So what if you move? My dd still keeps in touch with her friends from years ago in primary who are now two counties over.

Thank you for this. At the time it was positives and I was ready for the change and to focus on the next steps as like I said this first step is more getting us on the property ladder and to sort of find our place but now we’re in it feels so final that’s it’s really got to me that what if. I don’t work well with change and suffer with bad anxiety so this is just clouding my judgment massively as atm I just either am trying to find positives or just keep thinking the potential negative outcomes. I can’t help but feel it’s a nice ok area definitely for now but that I maybe want more from an area which admittedly we couldn’t afford at this time in general so hopes as something to work towards but that leaves me feeling guilty moving them now from London for what feels like just a temporary feeling. I really don’t know how to live in the moment feeling this way. At the moment, we’re still having to travel back into London for school as there isn’t any places available just yet so just really up and down.